[5/25/13 12:16:13 PM] Dima Tabraoui: Why Was I Feeling So Much Fear? To get the answers, I started doing some research. What I learned was that fear is the number one cause behind every judgment you make, complaint you have, and excuse you give. Fear motivates you to blame yourself for just about everything, and forces you to doubt yourself time and time again. Sure, fear can be an asset. It can protect you from harm and make you proactively seek solutions to problems. But fear can also do so much damage. It certainly did a number on me and my life! This fear had kept me in a prison of low self-esteem for so many years. Looking back I saw how my career failures, my miserable marriage, my drinking…all of these were symptoms of a life lived in self-loathing and avoidance, rather than confidence and creativity. How Does Fear Do This? These Are The Facts I’ve Learned About Fear: FEAR is One of Our Most PRIMAL Survival Mechanisms. The Body’s Reaction to Fear is the SAME Whether it’s APHYSICAL Or EMOTIONAL Threat. The Hippocampus Stores REAL Or PERCEIVED ThreatSignals In Long-Term Memory. The Brain Responds to Potentially Dangerous Stimuli BEFOREIt Has All The Facts (Based On Past History And Past Hurts). The Brain Is Programmed to Detect Dangers Routinely.Experienced By Our ANCESTORS And Those Learned AboutBy Each Of Us INDIVIDUALLY. Our Ability To ERASE The Memories of Fear is HIGHLYUNLIKELY. Fear Is Triggered By The UNKNOWN. After reading this list you might be thinking ‘what I was thinking’: “I don’t have a chance!” I mean, how is anyone supposed to figure out how to change their life when fear responds with a hair trigger to just about anything, especially new and unknown situations? Think about it: Any new action we take, any new thought we have, has an element of risk, right? We don’t know if we will be successful at it. We don’t know what others will think. We don’t know how our life will change if we fall in love, change our job or lose weight. There are no guarantees in life. That’s why we worry so much and why we doubt ourselves. [5/25/13 12:16:45 PM] Dima Tabraoui: I stopped blaming myself for what happened to them. I started to take a deep look at what was driving my life and everything I was doing. I started to notice a pattern, and this pattern revealed to me the underlying cause for all my problems. I Discovered That Beneath All The Low Self-Esteem, Lack Of Motivation, Procrastination, Blaming And Depression, That There Was One CORE Emotion That Was Running My Life… FEAR I Was Afraid of What People Thought of Me. I Was Afraid to Fail. I Was Afraid That I Wasn’t Good Enough. I Was Afraid That I Wasn’t Living up to My Own Expectations. [5/25/13 12:18:24 PM] Dima Tabraoui: When I recognized this, I thought, no problem, I’ll fight the fear by being more positive. I’ll “pep talk” myself into pushing past the feelings holding me back from living a better life. What I learned is that a pep talk just isn’t enough. I bet you know this, too. Telling yourself to do something or to avoid something is manipulation of your willpower, and does NOTHING to stop the cycle of fear. That’s why, without dealing with your core fear, it’s so hard to change your habits and embrace new (healthier) behavior. That’s Why Self-Help Books Often Do Not Help us to Permanently Change How We Feel. That’s why workshops, coaching and seminars that deal only with symptoms of fear, such as low self-esteem, lack of assertiveness, dating and relationship problems, procrastination and unhealthy habits DON’T WORK to alleviate your problem. That’s why sometimes even therapy never seems to get at the heart of what’s wrong. I knew that whatever I did, I had to stop the cycle of FEAR that was at the root of all my problems. How I Turned My Life Around From Suicidal Wreck to Waking Up Happy To Be ME! For me, it wasn’t easy. I was on my own. And any advice that did come my way just made me feel worse. It made me doubt my ability to change my life. Out of sheer desperation, I started creating exercises to save myself. I started developing my OWN ideas. I learned to recognize fear the moment it gripped me and threw me into a self-destructive response, such as lying, blaming, unhealthy eating, pity, laziness and negativity. I learned how to STOP fear in its tracks and how to reverse the spiral into proactive, healthy responses to whatever was happening. I learned how to get in touch with my essential nature, my true values, and how to make decisions based on those values instead of based on fear. I learned how to honor myself by setting strong, appropriate boundaries and how each time I did so, I gained more and more respect for myself and from others…and this in turn empowered me to be true to myself, always. I won’t lie to you. It wasn’t always easy. I didn’t always get it right. I had setbacks. But Eventually, Through Trial And Error, I Discovered An Effective, Specific Method of Freeing Myself From The Cycle Of Fear Once And For All. And When I Did… … My Whole Life Changed I became a completely different person. I stopped my self-destructive thoughts and behavior. I began to make healthy, rational decisions about my future. I felt alive and whole again. I was finally free to do whatever I dreamed of doing. I became a person who lives fearlessly. [5/25/13 12:19:33 PM] Dima Tabraoui: What Would Your Life Be Like If YOU Were Fearless? If you learn how to live your life fearlessly, you’ll be a completely new person, too. Just imagine…You’ll have a fresh start. You’ll stop second-guessing yourself about everything and approach your life with confidence and courage, sure of who you are and the decisions you’re making. You’ll Have Engaged, Connected Relationships Because You Won’t Be Concerned With What People Think of You. You Won’t Avoid Conflict, So There Will Be Less Resentment And Anger In All Of Your Relationships. You’ll feel comfortable in your own skin and with your own feelings, giving yourself ample permission to laugh, cry or express your TRUTH, even if others are giving you dirty looks or gossiping about you. You won’t waste so much of your time worrying about the future or dwelling on mistakes of the past. Instead, you’d be grateful for all the experiences of your life and you’ll feel empowered going forward, because you’re confident in all your decisions. You will see all your experiences as guides and opportunities (not obstacles) to do better and feel better. You’ll never demean yourself or belittle your accomplishments or good deeds, because you will know who you are and you’ll have confidence in yourself and your abilities. Co-workers and friends will be more relaxed around you and will trust you with important things. Suddenly, more career opportunities will appear because people will recommend you. You’ll have more respect and affection from friends and family, because they’ll enjoy your company. You won’t hope that others won’t take advantage of you, because you’ll have the ability to fully trust yourself, and therefore know you could handle anything. Imagine all that. How does it sound to you? Is it possible to be a completely fearless person? To live in a way that’s vibrant, passionate and confident? The answer is yes! I believe every single person has the ability to be fearless. Every single person was born with courage, self-esteem and with a generosity of spirit. I know it’s true: I’ve experienced it, I’ve witnessed it, and I’ve helped make it happen for others. When life is challenging and people hurt you, you can’t help but shrink your life. You fear more and more as time goes by. You fear change. You fear NOT changing. Your life becomes smaller and you feel yourself constricting. Unless you know how to break that cycle once and for all, you’ll never realize the purpose and potential you were born with, and you’ll be stuck in a SMALL and UNHAPPY life. It’s time to break the cycle and live the life you were intended to live, as the powerful, courageous person you know you are.
Posted on: Sat, 25 May 2013 20:52:33 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015