"A Reflection on Sensitivities" I think on moments when I have allowed my senses to be influenced by stories and false imaginings playing in my head. I have these insecurities that are difficult to accept are a part of who I be because I know that my truth is Love at the center, but I lose my balance when I allow the pettiness of it all, the stubborn feelings, the inability to give way to any other possibility being entertained that might be less of a judgement or an offense toward me. I let myself be offended. I become defensive. In these moments of sensitivity, the sense I have made to the situation becomes non sense, it becomes intricate ideas of what someone else may think or feel of me in reflection to my own self deprecation, not in truth to what I will not allow them to say to me of how they may actually feel or think. I deny reality in these moments and it makes my head so hard that I can’t allow the frown or scowl on my face or my silence to be removed and it becomes telling, it screams out that I am upset. In these moments I cannot allow myself to just voice why. It’s exhausting. Draining. But I do this to myself and it happened again today, and I reflect on this and make way for betterment in this moment of recognizing where these sensitivities are harmful to my spirit. I am working on bettering myself in these moments, to speak on my thoughts and set aside any shame I may carry for having these feelings. The truth is that initial thoughts and feelings created can absolutely be valid- reason to our feelings begin somewhere, look at them and understand them for where they begin and allow yourself to speak for then then, as opposed to allowing then to grow into tangled imaginings that can escalate conflict if they are not addressed. Harboring them and not allowing for the flow of communication to wash healing waters over these situations is even more damaging to the spirit. I am learning to breathe through these moments, and with compassion and understanding toward myself and the other I inhale and exhale I make room with these breaths to be humbled and to hear and see another truth than just my own, to take on responsibility for my feelings and actions in response to them and to allow understanding through communication. I want to build in Loving, heal through Loving, create through Loving and be Loving always and I cant when my sensitivities create a fog over my heart. In these moments where Love combats the immense power of my insecurities, and excavates them at the root to be replaced with betterment and light- I come closer to allowing Love to have a sustained home at my center and allow others to enter. loveisarevolutionaryact.tumblr/post/52950846609/a-reflection-on-sensitivities
Posted on: Fri, 14 Jun 2013 19:56:52 +0000
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