....Do we ever let go of past loves? What is it that keeps us thinking about the what ifs of those relationships. Perhaps they were our first love and we long to go back to that innocent time in our life where we did not worry so much? What if it really lasted?what if we married and had children? What if we never meet anyone that we could feel the same way about? These are our lost moments in life and sometimes the need to recapture them is overpowering. Why? ....This happens to us because we do not deal with our lives in the present. We are always going back there and lamenting(crying) about how wonderful life was then and how now we are so unhappy now! We exaggerate how great things were so we can continue to compare our life today to what it was then. Nothing will come close to what our mind has created for us in the past. THAT person was the kindest, sweetest, most caring person. Because it was in the past we can make it into anything we want it to be. This is one way of not dealing with the present. .... What happens to our present relationships? They #JUST do not meet the standard that we set from our great love from the past. This is not true! We just do not want to deal with what we have so we long for what we do not have. There are so many of us who are guilty of this. If that relationship from the past was so great, why didnt it work? Oh, we can give ourselves the excuse that we were too young and didnt know how to deal with anything but guess what, we still dont! ....We have been running away from our truth about who we are in a relationship forever. We do not want to see what our part in a break up is or we fantasized that the grass was always greener( we cannot deal with the one we have so find a new person) so find someone else. #THAT person will be better, ....#STOP! Stop running away from today by thinking about tomorrow all the time. We need to remember that we are no prize in a relationship either. NO ONE IS! Be grateful for what you have, not for what you lost. Think about how the other person might feel knowing your longing for the past is always there when there is conflict. Deal with conflict today so tomorrow you can look back at this very person and know that the work you did to solve conflicts together was worth it. This is your future! LIKE Relationship Talk
Posted on: Sat, 13 Sep 2014 15:38:44 +0000
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