‘I Say Goodbye and You Say Hello’ When I squeezed myself out of the womb, I said ‘goodbye’ to a warm dark place where I floated in security soothed by the hi-fi cadence of my mother’s beating heart. I begrudgingly said ‘hello’ to bright lights, loud noises, intrusive hands, and a swat of my brand new butt. I let out a yelp of protest and the game was on, no turning back. And that rhythm of ‘hola/hasta la vista’ would be the tempo of my entire life; everyone’s life. A character in a Roger Zelazny story says, ‘good-bye and hello, as always,’ while Paul McCartney sings, ‘I Say Goodbye and You Say Hello,’ capturing the theme song of the human experience. Another Beatle tune, a melancholy song, ‘She’s Leaving Home,’ is a sorrowful tale of a mother who discovers her daughter has left home. Sad from the mother’s perspective, but exhilarating from the daughters. When I pulled out of Dodge, headed for college, never to return, there was no sadness, only the electricity of ‘gettin’ it on.’ Of course the 60’s had said goodbye to the staid 50’s generation, and had turned society inside out, fueling my desire to leap. I couldn’t wait to ‘fly-the-coop,’ not knowing at the time, that that moment of departure was a signature life event. My flight pattern was confirmed. Off I went thrilled to the bone. Since the moment we stepped out on stage, we have been leaving, saying ‘so long’ to parents, stages of life, grades in school, friends, events and ceremonies, jobs, locations, places of residence, experiences, sometimes spouses, all the time birthdays, on and on it goes, one metamorphosis after another. We are always graduating. My three-year old nephew used to bellow at the top of his lungs every time he approached a door, “I’m leeeeaaaaving!” Obviously, going somewhere was notable to his undeveloped brain. We are ‘leaving freaks,’ doped up on movement; an addiction we can’t quit, and true to our earthly enterprise, going out the door is important even to the end of our journey. We cannot forget the ‘arrival’ part of the equation; the coming of something new. Perpetually, my thoughts are morphing, opinions, theological notions, political views fluxing, and relationships mutating as I advance in the ebb and flow of lifes continuum, moving on to the next fresh adventure, acquaintance, event, promise. On November 2, 2014, Facebook had a piece about making changes, moving on to rid oneself of boredom or a meaningless condition. We were encouraged to consciously decide to better a dead-end situation. Good advice. However, you cannot stand still, no more than you can stop the tides. Even if you try, you’re moving in time. Always the mystery of ‘what next?’ is there to greet you, in micro and macro dimensions. That’s the way it is. Leaving leads to new people and new experiences. Constantly in the churn of transitions, life is shaped by our migrating from everything. You cannot develop and grow without leaving something, and being introduced to the unknown, be it departing ignorance, lack of skill, or previous height and weight and finding life novel on the other end. Transitions teach us openness, to take risks, to stretch our perceptions and deepen our experiences. They put flesh on our existence, turning being into living. However, they can be sad too. Seeking the next horizon is good, but we don’t always get to choose. Occasionally the unexpected is thrust upon us, like a death of a friend, forcing us to leave someone who filled our life with goodness and meaning. The wrenching sadness of heart, thoroughly unwanted, nevertheless imparts us the nature of our temporal existence and encourages us to focus on the moment with a laser-guided mindfulness. Even in grief we move on. Goodbye-hello… Gordon Lightfoot’s ‘Early Morning Rain,’ is a ballad about love that says goodbye. Though something original lies ahead, the lover cares not. He misses what was and that’s everything. We‘ve all been there leaving us plaintive and reflective and lamenting the ‘so long.’ Meanwhile life shoves us down the tracks. ‘Adios’ tugs at the heart as we depart from a known to an unknown, leaving behind those who once played a valuable role in our lives. Sometimes we are coerced to experience ‘so long – hi there.’ Is not nostalgia our effort to relive that moment in which we had to leave, our attempt to keep what abandoned us? Unfortunately, nostalgia offers us only fantasy, then on we go. Scriptures are no stranger to this march, obsessed with their own goodbye-hello phenomena. The book of Genesis says for the cause of intimacy, ‘a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife…’ And later, Adam and Eve were ordered to leave the Garden. They said farewell to their innocence and their untainted beauty and hello to a life of peril outside paradise. They were rulers demoted to being owned by the environment. Abraham was told in Genesis 12, to abandon everything familiar to him and venture off to a strange place God would show him. Goodbye-Hello. Moses had to depart Egypt. Israel exited slavery. The Scriptures are replete with departing occasions that characterize the human predicament. ‘The promised land’ could not be entered without leaving the land of Pharaoh. Jesus left heaven to find his place among flawed human beings. He exited the manger for the wilderness and finally the tomb to something unique and unimaginably new. Christian ‘repentance’ is turning from a life of self to the life of the Other. Sue Monk Kidd mentions the words leave-arrive, end-begin, shed- emerge, in terms of conversion, another graduation. The bible underscores we cannot stand still for long, not if we want abundant life. Scriptures are clear: make the most of your time here, live well, and exercise goodness, love mercy, for here on earth, ‘tomorrow’ is uncertain. For now, keep moving, like it or not. Try to count the number of times you leave something/someone in a given day. You leave your slumber, your bed, your night clothes (or the lack of them). You leave the table, the garage, the car, the building, etc. Hi and ta-ta is the transience in which we live. Goodbye-hello is ‘time’ as we know it; the inhale-exhale of impermanence. It is our distraction as we rush to our destiny, our basic common denominator describing life. Hello- goodbye, goodbye-hello. Similar to the life principle a seed must die for new growth to occur, so is Goodbye-hello. And experienced at every moment of our lives, we better enjoy it. Emily Dickinson writes, ‘Forever is composed of ‘nows.’ The best grasp of life’s ephemeral nature is to embrace today. See the now, touch and feel the moment, frequently hug those in your circle of intimacy, appreciate their very breath, understand their human perspective, be in the twinkling. Earthly existence moves us in the fast lane; the ‘ciao-arrivederci’ precedes us, carries us, and will remain after us. There’s something about this phenomenon that speaks to my soul; something simple and profound, demanding a second look. Is it possible this ‘farewell-greetings’ life-describing repetition is our glimpse at Eternity’s rhythm? Our peek at the pulse of forever, our timeless marching orders? If so, might we not find hope in this simple pattern of reality? If now, why not then? Promise lacking evidence, there’s plenty of existential angst about the future. Doubt is formidable when it comes to Forever. Even Scriptural assurances require belief and belief frequently battles doubt. Uncertainty is our only option and Faith our tool of defense. Since our world spins on the goodbye-hello axis, perhaps eternity does too. Perchance this ‘see ya - how ya’ doin’ singularity offers insight into a shadowy consideration. The present is our eternity for the instant, as it leads us down the road to our final ‘cheerio’ on this planet. It never stops for us until it does. Then what? ‘Here I am/ on the road again/ there I am/ up on the stage/ here I go/ playin’ star again/ there I go/ turn the page.’ (Bob Seger).
Posted on: Wed, 07 Jan 2015 05:13:14 +0000
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