“Pope Pius XI, in his encyclical on Christian Marriage, advises three things in the choice of a marriage partner: (1) prudence in judging the character of a possible partner, (2) earnest prayer for divine help, and (3) the advice of parents. The various checklists of character traits to be looked for in a prospective wife may be cut down to four groupings: (1) spiritual, (2) personal, (3) domestic, and (4) social characteristics. Spiritual traits: For a happy marriage a Catholic man must choose a girl who is a practical Catholic, one who not only knows her religion but also practices it. This qualification is basic; lack of it should be considered an automatic elimination of a girl for further considera¬tion as a possible wife. Personal traits: Fundamental here is a similarity of character with the man: similar home backgrounds, similar education, similar tastes, similar temperament. Genuine love for him, so far as a man can judge such things, usually results from similarity of character. Other important personal traits include: generosity, intelligence, sincerity, emotional maturity, refinement, and neatness. Domestic traits: A girl will make a good wife if she loves the home; that means that she loves children, knows how to cook and keep house, knows how to buy and save, and is not lazy. Social traits: Generally if a girl likes people she will be easy to get along with. She needs a good sense of humor as an antidote against nagging, and she must be able to carry on a conversation without gossiping. Marriage counselors advise a man to study the home of the girl. He can get some indication of the girl as a future wife if he notes the kind of woman her mother is; he can get an idea of her attitude toward him by seeing her attitude toward her own father and brothers. This study will balance his knowledge of her on their dates: as husband and wife they will live in a home, not on the dance floor, nor in the theater or at parties.” —Directives for Happiness (Cum Permissu Superiorum, Nihil Obstat and Imprimatur, 1957).
Posted on: Sat, 28 Jun 2014 19:10:19 +0000
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