~So after a year and a half my ex abusive husband FINALLY went to jail on Monday, November 4th, 2013 on his 5th violation with no prior time served except slaps on the wrist by the previous county we lived in and one slap on the wrist in my hometowns county due to not transferring his 4 month probation he got for the 3 violations in 4 days while I was in the Berks Women in Crisis Center for a month. He used his visitation with my son to pick him up and come strait to my work and hung around near wear I was working and pretty much used our son as bate and to say Haha I got visitation.(because our son is the only thing he had left to get at me with) The Supervisor/Mediator for the supervised visits and then the one day a week unsupervised who is supposed to be neutral pretty much stuck up for him the whole time. (So glad shes out of the picture!) The first time this Narcissist hit me was on maternity leave with our son. He cracked me in the nose and it was cracked and bled over his mood swings of not having any pot to smoke. He has spit in my face, thrown me into walls and my head made a dent, pushed me from behind so hard I hit the floor so hard, dragged me out of bed in a dead sleep so that I slammed flat on the floor, grabbed me by the face with his huge hand while I was holding Dominic and threw me on the bed, told me to do myself and everyone else a favor and kill myself, I was every name in the book, He pushed me into the steps as I was walking up them, twisted my arm, punched me so hard in the jaw my tooth went through my lip and my jaw was black and blue for 3 weeks, thrown me across rooms in to walls like a rag doll in front of Dom our 3 1/2 yr old. (He was 2 at the time when he through me across the dining room into the wall as Dom stood in the doorway and watched as I was trying to get my barings crying frantically. That was the last time he did that EVER! AND the look on Doms face is forever burned in my memory) He took money from my purse and use to spend his money so I would have to pay the bills or we would get shut off or evicted. I bought everything for Dom and some stuff for my stepson too. He has punched me in the head, smacked me in the face and dug his elbow into my arm while I was pulling on his shirt because he wouldnt get off me. Told me many times I couldnt do this and I couldnt do that from cooking to my job to being a mother. It was always my fault no matter what! If he didnt get his way......watch out. He might throw his cell phone at me, tell me I couldnt drive the car, I had to take the expedition bc it was more of a gas hog. Never really felt any remorse except when he punched me in the jaw. Cheated on me which I later found out after I left. And I could go on and on and on..........He was sentenced to 3 months in jail and 3 months probation and mandatory completion of the Batterers program (as I requested in my victims impact statement) $1,000 fine.......and it gets better. The DA found a Bench Warrant on him in Berks County where this all started for failure to appear(probably because he got behind or didnt pay his fines from the previous violations) Hes already behind in child support but I dont care. Its just money. Money wont make up what he put my son and I through! Now hes sitting in the county prison. Oh and I use to have to watch him beat my stepson with emotional and behavior problems for getting into trouble all the time which he would do nothing about. In front of me and my son. My stepson even got caught slapping Dom in the face when he was one while I was at work by my father in law. So he may lose custody of him. It will be the best thing for that kid to go with his mother!!! And I will strait up tell you......I dont feel bad at all! He took away my self-respect, my pride, my dignity, my soul, myself as a whole not to mention my self-esteem. I went from the biggest social butterfly to a hole so deep I wouldnt wish it on anyone.....BUT I fought and I fought hard to put myself back together. All the broken pieces one by one......with the help of my family, friends, counseling, rehab(I use to drink to numb the pain and 2 duis later it was time to deal with all the underlying issues. I had the best counseler there that focused on the important things. Thank you Amanda) the grace of God, my son and most of all by digging down deep into what ounce of strength I had left and fighting back with everything I had. Im finally happy again, myself again, but a stronger sense of self. More compassionate, understanding, and less self-centered. My goal is to help women get out of this situation....just like I did!~ It took me 2....yes 2 times to leave.) Statistics say it takes a woman/man to leave up to 11 times before they finally leave for good. Oh no....not me! And you better believe that I fought back at him physically in any way I could. Sometimes I would wake up and I was so sore from head to toe I could barely move or walk up the steps or pick Dom up. So before youre so quick to tell someone in this situation to leave.....its just not always that easy! Let me tell you......you CAN get out and You CAN be happy again! I love my son, my family, my life, my job, and Im grateful more than anything for each and everyday and I soak up the little things that matter and I will continue to do this while the man who told me hed slit my throat or Id be breathing out of tube in the hospital is sitting in jail and justice has been served!!! I will continue to pray for him because I have forgiven him.......But not forgotten!
Posted on: Thu, 07 Nov 2013 15:01:40 +0000
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