10 Runners Youll Spot on Race Day: 1. The Shoe in. Usually a man, and by man, I mean, 17 year old boy that carries his track team. Possibly a Kenyan exchange student. Will be dressed in shorts and carry no water or fuel despite the weather or distance of race. 2. The Bouncer. You wonder if theyve got springs in their Sauconys. They just wont quit jumping around while waiting for the gun to fire. 3. The Rookie. You can tell this is their first race. Either from their disposition and the safety pin fumbling, or because they told you so. And everyone else, for that matter. 4. The Gazelle. The man or woman who is comprised of 75% legs. Their stride is one step for your 5 shuffles, and its just not fair. 5. The Cocker Spaniel: This person will use the bathroom at least 3 times before the gun fires. If they dont, theyll spend the entire race either looking for a port-a-potty, or terrified theyll join the single sock club. 6. The fashionista. Decked out in Lululemon and the latest Pair of Brooks. Even their ear buds look fancy. Theyll tell you all about their moisture wicking technology and debate the wearing of cotton socks. 7. The hospital patient: This runner is in rough shape, and really, should be home in bed, or in the hospital instead of racing. They often have at least three different injuries that theyve been nursing to be just tolerable enough to race. Their symptoms range from pulled/torn muscles, tendon flares, IT band flares, joint problems, fevers, respiratory infections, and more. Their running is ironically their sickness. 8. The DJ: If theyre not singing everything from The Beastie Boys to The Backstreet Boys, humming, or whistling, their music is likely loud enough that you could sing along to whatever embarrassing track on their playlist happens to be their power song. 9. The slob: Running can be a messy sport rendering some kind of in considerately sloppy. Behavior observed ranges from spitting, belching, being otherwise gassy, wiping a snail trail on a sleeve or bare arm. Coughing, hacking phlegm, and or sneezing in close proximity with disregard for nearby passersby. It happens to most of us. Sloppy happens. 10. The Chow Hound: This person runs the race for the massive buffet of peanut butter and bananas at the finish line. They usually take something to go. Theyre not fat. They just milk their race entry for every penny. Hey, feeding a runner is expensive! NR
Posted on: Wed, 27 Nov 2013 02:15:55 +0000
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