10 years ago this week I took a hard blow to my pregnant belly. This was at a store. A kid with a shopping cart. A silly accident. Sad for all of us. It tore my abdominal wall, aka diastasis recti, but a bit more than the normal pregnancy version. My uterus was damaged, my placenta was torn and I thought my son would die. When I was rushed to Duke, they said he was dead. I watched his heart restart on an ultrasound. I spent the rest of my pregnancy on my back in bed. I was grateful. I had already had so many losses. This summer I finally had the damages repaired. I waited because I had other issues to deal with. PCOS, endometriosis, I required a uterine ablation to stop years of constant bleeding. I had lumps removed from my breast. I has moles that had gone wrong. My pancreas was having issues. I had other health issues that if needed to deal with. I waited until I was healthy enough to handle it. But most of all, I wanted my son to be old enough to handle me being down for a bit. Yes Ive heard the jokes a few people have made about me getting the tummy tuck as well. It doesnt bother me. Ive heard about the jokes made about how I had certain medical issues because of the muscle damage. It doesnt bother me. So what if I lacked muscle tone and using the bathroom wasnt always an easy experience. This happens to women who have babies. Add injuries and things may not work that well. I know the people making these jokes will never really understand what I went through and I wouldnt change a thing. I feel sad for them. They will never know the love I have felt in my life. All they will know is how to make sure no one feels comfortable confiding in them again. I have a lovely little boy who lights up my world. And I still think its very cool that I have an internal corset holding my guts in! No amount of putting me down will build someone else up. I may not be your idea of beauty, so just leave it at that. And its not ok when men make comments. Not because you think I feel hurt, I truly dont. It just shows how little you know about a womans body and thats not attractive to anyone. Sorry this is messy. Im loopy from silly tonsils and my little boy is sick at his daddys and I want to hold him.
Posted on: Sun, 23 Nov 2014 03:45:13 +0000
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