14 years ago today my life was changed forever. I didnt know that morning when he came in to eat some leftover pineapple upside down birthday cake and to give me a kiss that it would be the last time I would ever see him smile. I wrote a paper in college titled Hope in a Pumpkin Patch that was supposed to be based on a real life experience, my professor gave me a failing grade because she didnt believe that my story was true (after providing proof I received an A). Looking back I almost cant believe it either. It used to replay in my mind over and over again in great detail but through the years those memories have faded; however, I can still see his face, hat cocked to the side and up too high with a sucker in his mouth peeking out from behind his teethy smile - clear as day. I remember how my heart would flutter when I would hear his red Ford coming up the drive or when I watched from our porch as he maneuvered his John deer through the fields like the expert he truly was. For years I couldnt talk about him much at all because the pain ran too deep but today so many years later I realize how much John and his passing helped me become the person that I am today. God knew his plans for both of us and I am thankful that I was chosen to be the one to see him out of this world and into the next. It amazes me how God can often prepare us for our departure when we are unaware; some of you might remember the day John and I came around hand delivering our wedding invitations. It was an impromptu idea and seemed crazy but to this day I believe God gave him the chance to see everyone who was dearest to him before he was taken home. I no longer question Gods motives for taking him so soon or for allowing me to suffer so greatly, I havent for a long time, instead I am thankful that He is in control and not me. If there are fields in Heaven John is on his tractor with a smile on his face and a sweet tea in hand! He may be gone from this world but he is never forgotten! October 7th, 1975 - July 29th, 2000
Posted on: Tue, 29 Jul 2014 16:48:36 +0000
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