#1935 I have a confession to make. I am in my final year at UBC and I feel like my entire time here has been a sham. Since my very first class Ive felt like someone made a mistake in admissions and that I never should have gotten in in the first place. I am nowhere near as smart as the people I have befriended over the years. I can barely afford to go here working part time because that is all I can do without sacrificing my grades. Not knowing anyone when I came to Vancouver, I looked into joining a sorority. However, that was out of the question since it is incredibly expensive. Any attempt to become a part of another community has utterly failed. I was rejected from RezLife, twice, a position that I wanted more than anything I have ever wanted before. I was rejected from any attempts to connect to my life on stage during high school as both the dance teams here are elitist and overly focused on appearance. I was a high-scoring competition dancer and these teams have even to me that I have great technique but not the right look. I looked into seeing if I could get involved with UBC Dance Club as an instructor and was told that they didnt want to move beyond their Latin styles. My attempts to climb up the ladder and make a greater impact in the community I did become involved in was rejected. And then, this term, I had a teacher outright pick on me in front of the entire class when she knows I have issues with public speaking and anxiety. The amount of times I have gone back and forth between wanting to give up and move back home and deciding to stay here and fight to prove UBC wrong are numerous. The problem is, I love UBC. I was so excited to come here; the campus and most of my profs are amazing. The problem is, UBC just doesnt love me. And this year I graduate and will be officially on my own with no more extra support. If I can barely survive this cushy life I have here in this supposedly safe environment, how am I going to be able to make it on my own in the real world that wont hesitate to bite you in the ass? Whats the point in trying anymore when UBC has crushed my spirit. How am I supposed to accomplish anything in life when the school I adore has destroyed my abilities to believe in myself?
Posted on: Tue, 11 Nov 2014 20:39:17 +0000