3:39am...Thursday...14 months...427 days... A grieving mother knows each one because it was the day her heart was broken forever. Few understand...truly understand...the heartache. We miss you so much, son. Some days seem so much harder than others. Some days seem so much darker than the day before. Today seems incredibly tough...not sure if it is because we lost another dear friend yesterday or if it is simply because it is a month where the 4th fell on a Thursday...just like on July 4th, 2013 at 3:39am when we were awakened with a knock at the door and the horrific news. I still remember it so vividly...the screams, sobs, tears, shock...and now the reality 14 months later. My God I miss you. I miss your phone calls every other day or so and how we talked all the way on my drive to work about nothing and everything. I miss your crazy and silly jokes and big-brother love for your sisters and little brother. I miss your laugh and your smile. I even miss that dang nasty long beard you often began growing in the fall of the year. The red beard. I miss your hugs. Oh, I really miss your hugs. But each day we are reminded that with the darkness comes the light and this morning Im reminded of Lamentations 3:23-24 (NLT) Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will HOPE in Him. As the days click away and weeks become months, we continue to mourn and grieve but we also continue to grow and keep our chins up. Transition is coming as acceptance peers around the corner. Healing begins every day. A desire to help others seems to be our calling right now...if it does nothing else than to honor your name and your life here on earth and the name and work of our Lord. Although we are often reminded of what we have called your Bible verse that we had read at the funeral and has such special meaning to us in your little green Bible (Joshua 1:9), we are often reminded of Isaiah 40:31 (NLT) But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. We love and miss you so much, Zac! Hugs to you in Heaven!
Posted on: Thu, 04 Sep 2014 10:28:11 +0000
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