30 Day Prayer Challenge Day 22, October 20, 2014 “And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” 2 Corinthians 3:18 Discovering that Jesus was my only Hope happened unexpectedly. As I took new and deliberate steps towards Him, I genuinely began to delight in pursuing Him. He seemed to delight in my pursuit. In fact, He appeared to be laying down the path before me, one gentle step at a time. I was reading the Bible, thinking I was skipping around in the 66 books at whim, only to discover that He was already there, explaining yesterdays reading in a completely different place that I picked the following day. Id hang out with Him in the morning on my porch before anybody else was awake. Then wed talk. I walked in the parking lot in front of my house and talked out loud to Him about everything. Id tell Him about all my confusion and anger, and give Him the whole new bleak day ahead of me. Scott and I were both in a wind tunnel, getting blown mercilessly by grief, and daily struggles. I knew he loved me, and I loved him, but he kept himself busy and seemed to have little time or reserve to connect with me on a substantial level. Somehow God was helping me, even if it was just to keep me from going crazy one more day. Some days I felt His presence. Some days I didnt. I kept pursuing Him regardless of what I felt. He wove through my thoughts, my fears, my pain, my past, the moment I was living in, my relationships with each member of my family, my deepest yearnings, and my exhaustion with life. Every day I did my best to not let the words remain on the tissue-thin pages of my Bible, to be closed in on itself and its pretty gold edges, never opening up inside me. The red fabric book-mark kept my place and hung out the window of my soul, begging God like Rehab did, to take care of me and my family as these walls around my life were being torn down. Strength rose in me that I never experienced before. My relationship with Scott was changing. Chaotic craziness and intense struggles were settling down in both of us. The peace that transcends all understanding was descending on every part of my life – past, present and future. I had become familiar with the way Jesus spoke. The Hope that comes as a result of the suffering was becoming real to me. The kids started praying for another baby. Scott and I knew we didn’t want our family story to end with Heather’s death. I had been running after God. I was experiencing freedom from everything that hindered and the sin that so easily entangled me. We were all excited when we found out I was pregnant on Thanksgiving Day, 2007. Scripture of the Day: “And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19 Song of the Day: I found You, by Anthony Evans (For the full effect, I highly recommend that you crank this song!) youtube/watch?v=9uy2CtzRnZE
Posted on: Mon, 20 Oct 2014 11:15:10 +0000
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