#43 Holy home uncut Act 1, Scene 1: The staff room: flickering incandescent lights Enter 3 teachers Maths Teacher: When shall we three meet again? In weekly, units, or in main? History Teacher: Or when the vacations done….. When the students have had all their fun…. English Teacher: Our questions will make them run…… MT: Where the place? HT: In the class….. ET: How many of them will finally pass? MT: I come Integration. HT: Hitler calls. ET: Anon. All: Fair is Foul and Foul is Fair, Good marks will become very rare….. Act 1, Scene 2: The principal’s office: Principal, School Prefects and a Student. Principal: Whatexcellent boy is that? He can report as seemeth by his marks, how he managed to pass? Head Boy: This is the boy, you see Who like a good and hardy boy Managed to finish section C. On top of that, inspite of perks… He agreed to tell me 20 marks! Arka: Doubtful it stood, As two spent swimmers that do cling together, And choke their art. On one side us, on the other the papers…. The merciless Maths Teacher, wothy to be arebel, For to that the multiplying problematicsums Do swarm upon us- from textbooks andprevious years papers’ supplied. And History Teacher on his damned quarrelsmiling, Proved to be an equal bore. But all’s too well for brave Rahul Jha-well he deserves the name. Disdaining questions, with a brandishedpen- Which was soon covered with inkstains, Like Valour’s minion, made up answers Till he could make up no more And took the English Paper, Which ne’er shook hands, nor bade farewellto it Till he tore it up from the nave to chaps And threw the rest upon his lap. Principal: O valiant student, worthy gentleman. Arka: As whence the sun gins his reflection, Moral breaking questions and direful marks, So from that spring whence comfort seemed to come, Discomfort swells. Mark Principal of DBB mark, No sooner gouranga with memory armed, Had compelled these tricky questions to trusttheir heels, But the Chemistry teacher, surveying vantage, With terrible questions and new supply ofsums Began a fresh assault. Principal: Dismayed this not our students Jha and Gouranga? Arka: Yes, as eagles sparrows, or the hare, the lion. If I say sooth I must report they were As mental patients over charg’d with double cracks, So they doubly made up answers on the go- Brave Jha, and Worthy Gourango… Principal: So well thy words becomethee as thy marks; They smack of honour both. Go get him students. Exit student and prefects Act 1, Scene 3: Adeserted classroom: Gourango, Jha and the 4 teachers Gourango: Tell methou insane teachers- MT: I know your thought, Hear my speech but say thou not. FirstVideo: Talking Maths Book Gourango,Gourango, Gourango; beware of Calculus. You won’t beable to solve even one sum Trust us. Jha: Whate’er thou say, for thy good caution thanks- Thou hast harp’d our fear alright. But one more word- HT: You speak too much and your marks are terrible as such. SecondVideo: Gandhi spinning a wheel Be bloody, bold,resolute, and laugh to scorn, the power of man; For no one without a tail,can prevent such an idiot- fail. Jha: Then go teachers, what need I fear of thee? But yet I wait to see, what you have to say Chemistry…. …………………………… To be continued( if there are enough comments, you narrow minded students) by Jasdeep singh khanuja Admin - first confession with a name on it.. Wait a sec,is this really a confession ? :o
Posted on: Sat, 08 Jun 2013 09:01:33 +0000
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