6 weeks ago, I was looking at having to admit to another treatment program. My summer at Princeton did more harm than good, and its been hard to recover from that treatment experience as it actually set me back (and Im still bitter about the thyroid damage!). This is one of the top programs in the country... Personally, I dont believe in treatment centers as always the best option for sustainable healing. There are some great tools to receive, structure, and support, but having to leave your own environment makes the transition home...rough. I always recommend someone try it at least once, because many people excel, but it is clearly nothing more than an extremely expensive stabilization experience for me. Today, Im feeling more normal and healthier than ever, and in the middle of winter at that (this is usually a much harder time of year for me). Despite difficulty coping with being a more normal weight, everything else is so much better. After 22 years of feeling hopeless and weary about life, I have a bit of excitement in my bones. THIS makes a world of difference. Im actually excited about lifes possibilities where Im used to fantasizing about suicide. How the switch? I prepared for it for years collecting data and integrative / holistic methods...both from my graduate training and personal treatment experiences...and finally decided to actually implement the ideas that sprung from all I learned. MOST IMPORTANTLY, Im implementing this in my home environment. I had been loyal to the mainstream approach despite my heart and creative side being drawn to a totally different way. I even put myself through ECT this summer. With a promising 85% success rate, I didnt want to leave a single stone unturned so I literally had my brain zapped out of desperation. All it did was further turn me into a zombie. I even took cocktails of promising psychotropic medications that debilitated me, zonked my memory, and left me crashing my car falling asleep at the wheel trying to get to the doctor. All this because there is little evidence-based research on holistic healing... Guess what!?! I dont care what the research says! Ive made holistic health my primary mode and things are falling into place! Just because there isnt research for something doesnt mean it cant work! It more than likely means the method isnt profitable enough to warrant funds being allotted to study. So much of this comes down to the almighty dollar! The medications that ruined my life were evidence based. The ECT that turned me into a drooling zombie was evidence based. The talk therapy Ive been doing for 20+ years, talking in circles, also evidence-based. None of it worked for me. What is working? Eating medicinal foods, mind-body work, yoga-meditation, channeling obsessive energy into health and creative projects, lots of patience and kindness with the self, aromatherapy/ essential oils, herbs, expressive arts, IV vitamin therapy, and taking things super slowww Recovery centers dont exactly allow people to unfold slowly. They have strict time constraints based on the interests of insurance and not the needs of the patient. These centers have a place and they save lives, but for real HEALING, make sure you have a well-rounded aftercare plan to transition home! Hoping to eventually publish a multi-media project for holistic mental health care. :)
Posted on: Wed, 24 Dec 2014 17:43:37 +0000
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