9MAR1864: In a ceremony at the White House at 1pm, Major General Grant is promoted to the new rank of Lieutenant General. With this new rank, LTG Grant is now assigned by President Lincoln to command all the Armies of the United States, and the General-in-Chief, Major General Halleck, is made his Chief-of-Staff. Lincoln thanks MG Halleck for his “able and zealous” service … but MG Halleck does not have the brutal war-crime mentality that Lincoln is looking for. LTG Grant is just the man Lincoln is looking for, who is willing to forego prisoner exchanges, bomb and shell women and children in towns and communities, and conduct a savage scorched-earth strategy to win the war. LTG Grant replaces himself with his favorite war-crime dog, MG Sherman, who is promoted from the Department of the Tennessee and placed in command of the “Division of the Mississippi”, which has the following organization: Division of the Mississippi [River] – MG William T. “War Crimes” Sherman Department of the Ohio [River] – MG John M. “March to the Sea” Schofield Department of the Cumberland [River] – MG George H. “Virginia Traitor” Thomas Department of the Tennessee [River] – MG James B. “Fratricide” McPherson Department of the Arkansas [River] – MG Frederick “Dictator of Ozarks” Steele The rest of the US Army remains organized as independent departments follows: Department of the Potomac [River] – MG George G. “Do Nothing” Meade Department of the South – MG Quincy A. “Human-Wave Attack” Gilmore Department of the Gulf – MG Nathaniel P. “Commissary” Banks Department of the Pacific – MG Irvin “Indian Killer” McDowell Department of the East – MG John A. “Kill the Irish” Dix Department of Washington – MG Christopher C. “Lincoln’s Guard” Augur Department of the Missouri [River] – MG William S. “I Quit” Rosecrans Department of New Mexico – BG James H. “I Kill Indians Too” Carleton Department of the Northwest – MG John “Command from my Saddle” Pope Despite the fact that Lincoln is the first atheist President, he is not afraid to invoke powers beyond his understanding and speaks to LTG Grant about his new edict … to commit war-crimes … by his supposed authority “under God”. Lincoln makes it clear that this new command “shall prevent or obviate any jealousy of you from any of the other generals in the service; and second, something which shall put you on as good terms as possible with the Army of the Potomac”.
Posted on: Mon, 10 Mar 2014 03:15:16 +0000