A CF Mothers Fight The day your child is born, youre in awe of the beauty before you, you imagine the days of first steps, first words, first day of school. You watch them grow and help them to achieve all these things. You cheer them on, encourage them and teach them. You watch them with a mothers eye and carefully help them through all the newness of the world, you heal them when they are sick, staying up all night, checking on them, giving medicine, you patch up there boo boos with funny little bandages that make them smile. And always hug them close when they need you. But the feeling of helplessness that overwhelms, when you cant heal them, is unbearable. There is not a bandage big enough to fit the wound you cannot see. The damage to his lungs, with every breath that is hard to breath. The damage to his body, that you cant stop. When he is trying to take his first steps and getting tripped up the oxygen lines. When he wants to run and play, but cant because he is too winded to stand. When he wants to go to the first day of school and be part of the excitement of it all, and he cant because he is on an I.V. and you cant expose him to other kids. There is not a band aid big enough... I hate that I cant fix it. I hate that I have watched for 16 years, on the sideline, without being able to help him, to fix him. I hate knowing there is no cure. I hate knowing every year it gets worse for him. The feeling is unbearable. If I could rip my lungs from my own chest and give them to him, I would. Just to be able to see him breath, just breath. I hate cystic fibrosis and what it taken from my son. The not knowing if he will be able to breathe today, tomorrow or ever. Constantly watching him catch his breath, watching him struggle, watch him wheeze, cough and choke. Sometimes it is more than I can bare. But I have to be strong for him, when he is weak. I have to run for him, when he cannot walk a step, I have to yell for him, when he cant find the right words to explain the pain, I have to stand up for him, when no one else will. I will be the bandage to his invisible wound. I will fight his battle. I will get him a cure, I will find him new lungs, I will do whatever it takes to beat this. I am his mother, his friend, his advocate and I will win. Nicole Chellton
Posted on: Thu, 13 Nov 2014 18:10:28 +0000
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