A Choice to Forgive is a Choice to Heal Forgiveness is the decision and act of eliminating feelings of resentment, indignation or anger against another person for a perceived offense, difference, or mistake. Forgiveness is about setting you free and releasing the past in a way that it no longer has control over your thoughts and feelings. Forgiveness is not about accepting or condoning a wrong or an offense and, instead, is about taking steps toward your own healing. When forgiveness takes place, you release the disturbing thoughts and emotions that drain your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being. Forgiveness is an action; your healing is a process. Tips for Healing 1. Own your feelings. You have the right to feel the way that you feel, regardless of how insane, ridiculous, or overly emotional the person that probably offended you attempts to convince you that your feelings are. Your hurt is your hurt, and you have the right to it. 2. Don’t take it personally. Even though we give people permission to treat us the way that they do because we allow it, the manner in which they treat us is about THEM…not about US. We must all take responsibility for our behaviors and actions. However, just because a person mistreats you, it doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with you…it’s THEIR junk, so don’t take ownership of it!!! 3. Be aware. Know your expectations of others. People show us who they are and often times, we ignore it. Sometimes, they show us in the way that they treat us directly and other times, by the way they treat others. People are who they are until they choose to be different and your desire for them to be different doesn’t make it so. Learn to expect people to be just who they are…they would only do what you would do, if they were you! 4. Become a victor instead of a victim. Put your energy and efforts into things (and that means people, too) that are constructive and healthy. Whatever you invest in, is what grows. If you invest your time and energy concentrating on hurts and offenses--as opposed to resolving to move past them--they will manifest in your spirit and GROW! 5. Move out of your own way. You don’t have to stay angry. You are the only person standing in the way of you forgiving the person(s) who has offended you. As long as you hold on to anger, hurt and bitterness, you give the person that offended you control and power over you. 6. Count your blessings! Be glad that you are not like the person(s) who have offended you. And, make sure that if you have offended, that you make amends by acknowledging the offense, to allow the healing process to begin for the person that needs to forgive you! Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future. --Paul Boese Peace and Blessings, Dr. Adrienne
Posted on: Wed, 10 Jul 2013 12:35:46 +0000
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