A SOLDIERS LAST BATTLE. The days now long, the nights are longer, the ghosts and voices gotten stronger. More sights I see that are not there, more memories than I can bear, Each day gets tougher but still I stand, not sure how much, I understand, Sleep is elusive or not at all, thoughts are intrusive, try making me fall. I’m holding on though I know not how, think of today, think only of now. My sanity waning, health follows suit, the meaning of life slowly grows mute, I cannot give in my mind shouts at me, though end of this tunnel I no longer see. Now harder to leave this little home, prefer to remain in the dark and alone, Can’t recognise this land of mine, no place for me, am out of my time. It’s full of hate, of pain, all despise, full of Political greed and lies. Is this why I joined the nominal roll, is it worth my slowly retreating soul. The shrink says let’s talk but hears nothing I say, in reality, he is miles away, To those I meet I act to the norm, can never reveal my one true form. They couldn’t accept what I might say, could never believe it could be this way. My truth stays hidden, my burden alone, so I will remain in myself and alone. I cannot inflict this upon my dear ones; they have their lives, their daughters and sons. Am losing this battle, no longer feel sane, must carry on fighting, and play life’s game. This battle is lost but the war carries on, though hurting am I, my fight will go on, Why did I sign to join the muster, was it all boyish talk full of bristle and bluster. No down inside, in the depth of my bowel, I found my purpose, my duty, My Soul The night now is fading, the sun shines through shades, but dark thoughts and pain in light have stayed. I’m losing this fight, one day I’ll succumb, till then I must try, must fight till I’m numb. Remember of me a man full of life, a man who survived through trouble and strife, Who tried to live well, to value all life, who wanted respect and an honourable life. by Phil. M. Lamb© 6/6/2013 A SOLDIERS LAST BATTLE. The days now long, the nights are longer, the ghosts and voices gotten stronger. More sights I see that are not there, more memories than I can bear, Each day gets tougher but still I stand, not sure how much, I understand, Sleep is elusive or not at all, thoughts are intrusive, try making me fall. I’m holding on though I know not how, think of today, think only of now. My sanity waning, health follows suit, the meaning of life slowly grows mute, I cannot give in my mind shouts at me, though end of this tunnel I no longer see. Now harder to leave this little home, prefer to remain in the dark and alone, Can’t recognise this land of mine, no place for me, am out of my time. It’s full of hate, of pain, all despise, full of Political greed and lies. Is this why I joined the nominal roll, is it worth my slowly retreating soul. The shrink says let’s talk but hears nothing I say, in reality, he is miles away, To those I meet I act to the norm, can never reveal my one true form. They couldn’t accept what I might say, could never believe it could be this way. My truth stays hidden, my burden alone, so I will remain in myself and alone. I cannot inflict this upon my dear ones; they have their lives, their daughters and sons. Am losing this battle, no longer feel sane, must carry on fighting, and play life’s game. This battle is lost but the war carries on, though hurting am I, my fight will go on, Why did I sign to join the muster, was it all boyish talk full of bristle and bluster. No down inside, in the depth of my bowel, I found my purpose, my duty, My Soul The night now is fading, the sun shines through shades, but dark thoughts and pain in light have stayed. I’m losing this fight, one day I’ll succumb, till then I must try, must fight till I’m numb. Remember of me a man full of life, a man who survived through trouble and strife, Who tried to live well, to value all life, who wanted respect and an honourable life. by Phil. M. Lamb© 6/6/2013
Posted on: Thu, 06 Jun 2013 20:36:07 +0000
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