A commercial truck just skidded on the ice and crashed into the side of my car. Everyone is okay. Not his fault.. Not my fault. But I cant help but reflect on this event. Moments before the crash I was consumed in a frustrating world of thoughts, revolving around rotting food in my fridge that had stunk up the house while I was away, how annoying the separation anxiety being displayed from our cat had been, and how eager I was to get to the office. I knew there were icy conditions, but I still was not in a space of presence. I cannot be certain, but I am very confident that this accident could have been prevented if I was in a better mental state. One small lapse, leading to an unconscious event. However, I also have to be careful not to allow this as a pathway to lash myself with guilt. What has happened has already happened, and to obsess over it only further brings me out of the present. To judge myself simply feeds the self punishing aspect of my ego. The key is to learn what needs to be learned and then let it go. Looking at the crushed rear door of the car also challenges my attachment to material beauty. The car is structurally unchanged, but the aesthetic blemish causes me to feel differently about it. This is normal I suppose, but ultimately silly! Am I concerned about what other people will think of me because of the damage? If so, then the car has become part of my identity, which is a much bigger problem than any dent. Life is sadhana, spiritual practice. Using events that others would view as a blessing or a curse as simply another teaching opportunity from is the best way to grow. Thank you for lending me your ear - writing is also great therapy :)
Posted on: Tue, 28 Jan 2014 18:54:18 +0000
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