A message to my religious friends and family: I find it rather disturbing when religious people look at me with glee, as if Im a prospect for religious conversion. Its disconcerting to see people, especially those I care about, act like predators - and treat me like prey. Its also a very devaluing experience. The subtext of such interactions implies that my only value as a human-being is that of a potential convert. Furthermore, these attempts at religious conversion are devaluing for both the predator and prey. The value I see in you is independent of your religious beliefs - and acting like some sort of spiritual soldier only serves to tarnish that value with propaganda and a religious agenda. It takes away from your value; it doesnt add to it. Besides, people look funny, going to war on plastic high-horses. False piety and a pompous sense of certitude are quite unbecoming. If you want to have a frank, honest, and polite discussion about gods and religions, thats fine, Ill be happy to do that; but dont try to convert me - as I will not be seeking to deconvert you. If you want me to see some positive value or truth in your religious beliefs, simply reflect that in your genuine, kind, actions and words; for this speaks far more loudly than any coercive measures meant to persuade me into attending your place of worship, or some-other such thing. However gentle, loving, or well-meaning you believe these measures to be, you will not be able to avoid seeming predatorial. You will not be able to avoid the tarnishing. Try for these moments to ignore your religion, and see in me the value I already retain. Just be yourself. Be kind. Be genuine. Be intellectually honest. I am not hollow. My life is not without meaning. I do not have a god-shaped hole in my heart. I am not a sinner, in need of salvation. I am your family member. I am your friend. I am an atheist; and I am so much more. Try, if you will, to see your words and actions from my point of view - instead of how you think god is viewing your words and actions. If you have difficulty doing that, examine your attempts to convert me or persuade me into attending your place of worship, then imagine someone else - who believes in the existence of some other god(s) and follows some other religion - using these same methods on you. How would that poking, prodding, and coercion make you feel? Can you see how their attempts to convert you make them seem like a predator? Can you see how this experience makes you feel like prey? Can you see how your value seems to be diminished or absent, in the eyes of those trying to convert you? Can you see how their value becomes tarnished, in your eyes, as they treat you like prey? Be happy to see me because you are happy to see me - because you value me for who I am. Dont be happy to see me because you have an opportunity to try to convert me. Dont be a predator. When I am happy to see you, its because Im happy to see you - because I value you as a person. I dont see you as prey. You are my family. You are my friend. You are a theist, but you are so much more. If you choose to not consider this statement, do not be surprised when your coercive gestures, however gentle or well-meaning you believe them to be, are met with my gentle wit and sarcasm. If you so choose to pressure your religion on me, do not expect me to remain silent. With honesty, dignity, and respect, Ryan Burkhart
Posted on: Wed, 16 Apr 2014 13:10:55 +0000
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