A one night stand at Jazz Café & Grill – since they had shut Aylanto due to unforeseen circumstances, our next preferred choice for last night’s dinner was the somewhat recent entrant into the hospitality industry of Lahore, Jazz Café & Grill. It was my first visit to this eatery, and a much anticipated one. The design of the establishment is themed on an old-English tea room that is woodwork dominant with pleasantly soothing jazz classics in the background. After being greeted and seated, they presented three different types of menus, one for drinks, the other for winter specials and the third for all-day regular offerings. Restaurant staff seemed attentive and cheerful; they served the bread basket instantly that consisted of a medley of bread rolls paired with run-of-the-mill processed butter. It does not take much time to realize that the café is a close imitation of English Tea House (ETH) in terms of the overall theme and menu selection. We ordered Fried Calamari as an appetizer, extraordinary large rings of batter fried calamari served atop shredded ice berg with a couple of raw capsicum rings and half a cucumber, sad indeed. Tiny dip of tartar sauce came complimenting the calamari so poor that the batter started detaching the flesh the moment one tried to lift it with a fork. By chance if one succeeded at lifting the ring with the batter intact, the bites were so bland that only the hunger helped it from getting disowned altogether. They served the entrees on time, my pick for the night was the so-called Turkish Platter that consisted of Chicken Kabab, Lamb Kabab and Grilled Chunks of Chicken accompanied with what-they-call Saffron Rice, “Mint Raita” and home-made yogurt chutney. Instead of the promised radish and pickles, there was a ring of raw capsicum (again) and a pair of quartered cucumbers (even worse). I have never had such a “desified” Turkish platter in my life, the Chicken and Lamb Kabab could easily compete the ones you get served at local weddings while the Grilled Chunks of Chicken still had Turkish essence hidden somewhere behind those masalas. As for the saffron rice, not more than spoon full of artificially yellowed rice were spread atop buttered white rice in a desperate desire to tick the box. Since the plate in front of me was straight off disappointing, I started eying on my beloved friends’ entrees. They were generous enough to lend me a bite of their selections, not like they had a choice. I started with New Orléans Fried Chicken, stuffed breast of chicken covered in an overly thick mediocre batter served atop a handsome serving of fries along with two types of dips, a house salad and a tomato skin rolled up to resemble a red rose, that reminded me of my house-cook who tried to impress me with the same artistry some fifteen years ago. The stuffed chicken started to deconstruct the moment one tried to slice it, just like the fried calamari. Bland, boring and forgetful, nothing more! Next in the line of my fork was the Pan Seared Garlic Sauce Fish. Two fillets of Vietnamese pangasius, drizzled with a garlic sauce that might remind you of all the old-fashioned local Chinese eateries that have shut down, served alongside “masala” fried rice, a ring of raw capsicum (kill me now) and an artificial rose made of the tomato skin, nostalgic at max. The beef burger with an extremely lengthy title came with a miniature frying basket of fries, two types of dips and a house salad. I reluctantly took a bite and believe it or not, even Salt n Pepper does a better beef burger than this, sweetened tomato ketchup, mayonnaise and tomatoes sandwiched between a heavy bun along with home style beef patty. The last in queue was the subdued Beef Steak in Pepper Sauce. A fillet of pounded undercut served smothered in an ultra-thickened pepper sauce with sautéed vegetables and potato au gratin by the side, let’s just ignore the chef’s favorite capsicum ring. I didn’t bother to try the meat itself, but sauce quality could be determined by the overpowering taste of “Brown Sauce Powder” used instead of home-made demi glace. The placement of the restrooms only added to the misery, one has to pass by the shabby looking main kitchen entrance to get access to the restroom, I wonder what exactly was the architect thinking after doing such a great job with the rest of the establishment. I strongly believe that the place is in a desperate need of a more dynamic chef to bail the café out of the shortcomings, as opposed to the current chef who seems too scared to match his steps with the progressing culinary trends. It is unfortunate to see someone sitting on a goldmine and surviving on merely coal extraction. As the title of my write-up suggests, I do not see myself visiting back the eatery anytime soon. Overall Rating: 5.5/10 Pricing: On average Rs. 1000 for a two course meal per person Jazz Café & Grill is located right off MM Alam Road, opposite Depilex Men
Posted on: Wed, 19 Nov 2014 08:18:54 +0000
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