A pirate walked into a bar, and the bartender - TopicsExpress

A pirate walked into a bar, and the bartender said, BARTENDER..... Hey, I havent seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible. PIRATE......What do you mean?...... I feel fine. BARTENDER.....What about the wooden leg? You didnt have that before. PIRATE.....Well, we were in a battle, and I got hit with a cannon ball, but Im fine now. BARTENDER...... Well, OK, but what about that hook? What happened to your hand? PIRATE.....We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight. My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook but Im fine now, really. BARTENDER.....What about that eye patch? PIRATE.....Oh that, well one day we were at sea, and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up, and one of them shit in my eye. BARTENDER.....Youre kidding, you couldnt lose an eye just from bird shit. PIRATE......Not usually but........IT WAS MY FIRST DAY WITH THIS FREAKIN HOOK !!!!!!!!

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