A year ago today I began a journey, a journey not even myself believed was possible. I was at a place where I believe to be my lowest point, I had hit rock bottom. I knew that it had to be more to life then what I was experiencing. I was in a state of depression, and finally started to realize that the way I had been choosing to cope with it was not only effecting me it was effecting the people I love. I was killing myself, and where would my children be with me? I was totally out of control, I had lose myself. So I decided for myself and my children I needed to get myself together. So I called my brother Demoriea crying telling him I can no longer go on like this. I admitted to him that I was out of control and needed help. I believed that I needed professional help and that is what I told him I wanted. So Demoriea being who is got straight to work. In the process he called our Father only with my permission and shared with him our plans for me to go inside a treatment program. I had only one fear and that was leaving my children. My sister Teiara Tete Barker Wortham did not hesitate she said that she would stay with them. She knew that I needed this because she witness me crying for two days straight. She ask me what was wrong I replied Im Tired. So Demoriea even went so far as to find a place where I can possibly take two of my children Sabria and Jason with me and that was the plan. But once my Daddy got the news he said that I did not need to leave my home to get help. He told Demoriea Nesha can do this. When Demoriea told me this I just cried and told him I could not. That my Father had to much faith in me. That he did not know my day to day struggle with temptation. We went back in fourth and finally I chose to do it my Daddy way. His way was to pray and read my bible and whenever I got tempted to call him are anyone of my siblings but first call on Jesus. Lord is my witness I did not think it would work but I am a living testimony that Jesus has not failed me yet. It was hard and at times was so tempted and felt like giving up. But I called on Jesus and when I got tired of calling on him I cried cried and called on him some more. I Just want to say Thank You to My Mother and Father, Children Ronnisha Prevost, Sabria, Jason and Alonte, My Brothers and My Sisters Steel Bill Cameron Barker Demoriea Barker and Elliot Dinkins Teiara Barker KeyKey Barker Nakiema Barker for standing by me. Speacial Thanks to Deanna Patterson for being someone I can talk to without judgment and giving solid advice and My Right Hand Man KB for always having my back. Thank you to my Daddy for believing me and the Power of Prayer when I did not believe in myself. BUT MOST OF ALL I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THANK YOU TO JESUS FOR NOT GIVING UP ON ME, WHEN I GAVE UP ON MYSELF. MY NAME IS Kenisha Barker and this my testimony. TO MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS PLEASE DONT COUNT ME OUT, I AM A WORK IN PROGRESS!!!
Posted on: Thu, 11 Sep 2014 15:16:24 +0000
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