AA KILLED MY BABY! Is what she screamed as soon as I answered the phone. Tearfully this mother who had worked so hard and sacrificed so much, went on to explain that her daughter had been trying to kick heroine for the last few months. She did EVERYTHING she was told to do from getting up early, making sure she kept her appointments, following directions to a T, never being alone, and trusting the people she had met would help her. Because of her extended opiate use, her DOCTOR suggested medicated assisted treatment, (Suboxone), intensive outpatient treatment, (I.O.P.) and getting involved in 12-Step to support her efforts while waiting on a residential treatment bed at ____. Her desire to live the life she always dreamed about was so intense, she absorbed suggestion and took direction almost unconsciously, and acted immediately in the hopes of just getting better-daily. 3 weeks after her funeral, mom has mustered up enough strength to clean the room she allowed her daughter to come home to after she quit her well paying job, and walked away from her last semester before her Masters Degree in Business Management at ______. Apparently this bright, beautiful, 26yr old woman KNEW that if she stayed in school and on the job, her life would get worse due to her opiate addiction which took off after she survived a car accident in 2010. Her diary records the emotional and mental struggles she had for weeks prior to her overdose: 2/28/14 Im so freakin confused! This evening ___________and I were having a talk after the meeting at ___________. She said that I needed to be 100% clean in order to be sober. She said Dr. __________ is full of shit and I dont need any medication to live a good life. All I need is to be around strong people who have worked the steps and just do what they did. I know I can do it, and _________ seems so happy and care free, and her bf is so hott! But I wonder if I can have that too?.?.? I love you mom. I love you dad. I will make you happy one day. 3/8/14 Im sorry mom. Its harder than I thought. ..... That day her mother found her on the floor in her bedroom with the syringe still in her neck. The days between entries record her skipping IOP, purposely skipping her medication and struggling to get through it, hanging with sober people and going to more meetings. Do I agree with the first words spoken to me when I answered the phone... No, of course not. And It took quit a bit of time to help this mother realize that there are MANY in the rooms of 12-Step that believe what her daughters confidant do. What I DO believe is that there WILL come a time when people will QUIT THINKING THEY KNOW WHATS BEST FOR OTHERS, and THAT THEY KNOW MORE THAN EDUCATED PHYSICIANS, CLINICIANS, AND COUNCELORS, and afford people an opportunity to recover on a path designed around THEM-not what worked for you, or NOT just ONE PATHWAY!!!! My God... shes dead-gone... and its gonna take more effort to help her devastated family and friends deal with it than it would have if _________ wouldve just ACCEPTED something outside of what she heard or knew to be TRUE when it comes to helping people remain healthy! Condemnation before investigation is the height of ALL ignorance! and Im sorry, but if there are those who dont understand why people are on MAT, or believe its unnecessary-YOU are the most ignorant of all and I hope you get educated quickly! Let me know if I can help-not an expert, but I know why it WORKS!!!!!
Posted on: Sat, 29 Mar 2014 14:27:04 +0000
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