ATTENTION: This information is strictly for cyber-critics. It will sure help someone... The worst way to motivate someone is to deliver criticism in a harsh, sarcastic and angry tone while providing no idea of how to do things better. Such criticism displays an ignorance of the feelings it will trigger in those who receive it, and the devastating effect those feelings will have on their motivation, energy and confidence in doing their work. Another angle to this issue is that character attack-calling someone stupid or incompetent- misses the point. You immediately put the person on the defensive, so that hes no longer receptive to what you have to tell him about how to do things better. When people are led to believe that there failures are due to some unchangeable deficit in themselves, they lose hope and stop trying. Dont forget that the basic belief that leads to optimism is that setbacks or failures are due to circumstances that we can do something about to change them for the better. In essence, this is a call for empathy, for being attuned to the impact of what you say and how you say it on the person at the receiving end. I once asked a friend why many people delights in attacking Nigerian leaders when they themselves know that if they were to be in such posts, they might really not have performed better, given the peculiar challenges confronting the country. His response was that he would not have contested for Nigerian presidency if he had had no solution to the nations problems. I told him that I consider his response an insincere one. The truth is how many of us will turn down the offer to become Nigerias president? Having considered the level of importance people attach to their persons upon assumptions of not so significant posts, many are likely to jump at the offer. They will probably consider the responsibilities attached to the position later. The above submission should explain why I think it will be better if critics will take their time to provide solutions to the issues they raise in their write-ups before making such public. Such criticisms can then be regarded as intelligent submissions that could be accorded the utmost attention it deserves. My take is that any writer that cannot carry out adequate research to support his claims has no business criticising Nigerian leaders. For instance, check how other countries that have gone through critical times like the ones we are faced with in Nigeria were able to overcome and probably come up with adaptions that could suit the Nigerian context. Seriously, highlighting our problems for the reading pleasure of the international audience amounts to showing our dirty underwears to people who cannot give us the soap that will make it clean. We are just ridiculing our nation... # emotional intelligence#
Posted on: Thu, 04 Dec 2014 09:45:33 +0000
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