Aaron shared this on our wall. Thoughts? I wrote this post today ... I find there are few men who identify as gentle parents, and I was curious of your perspective on this. I selectively use the term gentle parenting. I love the philosophy, but Im not a big fan of the subtext communicated by the term (attachment parenting isnt any better). As a guy, when I imagine my children grown, I take little pride in having raised gentle people. Its not that I dont like gentleness, I do, but that isnt the term that comes to mind. I also dislike the connotation that will come with the term, that my children will be sheltered, fragile, or infantalized. The term erects a barrier of entry for a guy like me. If I ran into the term without having the same philosophical background that I had, I wouldve likely not looked any further into the idea after hearing the title (feeling like I knew what the goals were, and I didnt really wish to attain those goals). When I think about how I treat my children, gentle doesnt actually come to mind. It is the same way I treat my wife, gentle once again doesnt come to mind. What comes to mind for me is maybe; honor, individualism, respect, rebellious, heroic. When I think of my child grown up I feel like I didnt destroy her hero. I helped foster her respect for herself, and made her feel a sense of honor in her own mind and body. When I think about being aggressive with my child, I think about violating her will, her spirit of adventure, and making her into an obedient girl who has a leash on her that other people will inevitably grab onto. I do desire to raise children who will be gentle and who know how to treat other people with gentleness. however, that is secondary in my mind. What first comes to mind is honor. I think I take more pride in being an honor parent rather than a gentle parent.
Posted on: Tue, 16 Dec 2014 16:25:00 +0000
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