An imaginary conversation with the registrar of my Facebook account at the MCMC (Malaysian Communications And Multimedia Commission): My name is Eddin Khoo Bu Eng. I am 45 years old. I am Chinese of Peranakan descent and Indian-Tamil (of Jaffna Tamil extraction). And since I insist on this in each of your official forms, I will declare it here too: I will not choose one of the races offered since it would be an act of self betrayal and one or the other of my parents would certainly be hurt. If this inconveniences you then you can just cast me into the wholly convenient Lain-lain (Others) category with no recrimination on my part. I might add that I was raised for much of my formative life by a Malay woman - Minagkabau by descent - who lived and died happily in our household with her three children. Yes, I know I look Malay. But then I also look Nepali, Hispanic, North American Indian, Okinawan, Hawaiian, and depending where you are in Southeast Asia, I might be Cambodian, Burmese, Thai, Lao, Vietnamese, Indonesian, Singaporean, Filipino; I might pass for a Bruneian, even a Bangladeshi. Then depending on where I am in India, I could be Assamese, Manipuri, from Nagaland, even from some parts of Kashmir. If in Pakistan etc. etc. etc. I speak, write and read English, Malay and Indonesian fluently. I converse competently in Tamil but am learning the language arduously now so that I may translate a group of rather eccentric poets that belonged to a school called the Sangam who existed somewhere around 300 B.C. Why? Well, why not? I speak no Chinese. I am Hindu by faith, and a Kali Bhaktan (devotee) who follows the Tantric tradition. This may all be horribly confusing for this particular purpose so we will leave it as just Hindu. As a Kali devotee do I drink blood? Only on Tuesdays :) To your question why I do not follow my father...no, he is not Christian...no, he is not Taoist (what is that I ask you?)...and yes, he is Buddhist, but only by tradition. He is an agnostic... NO, that is not atheist, agnostic is someone who MIGHT believe in God but is rather too lazy to practice the rituals to find out. Just joking! :) But agonistic may again be all too complex for this purpose so lets just say he is AGAMA BUDDHA (a Buddhist) tapi tak ikut (but doesnt follow). Why do I not follow my father? Well, because he never insisted I do. And since he never followed his father it would be hypocritical of him to ask me to do so. I am a writer by profession, studied Islamic Thought as an Undergraduate... Thank you for your enthusiasm but why didnt I become Muslim? I suppose because I never saw the light but mostly because I didnt want people plastering my face on posters thanking God that the son of a famous man had seen the light. Just joking again! :) Actually, I love Islam, I always refer to the religion as offering foundations to all that I can call, today, my thought. I obtained my postgraduate degree in Archaeology. What? No, it wasnt because I lost interest in Islam, it is because I suddenly developed an interest in stones. Yes, I am still Malaysiakiniian and will remain so always. No-lah, its not because I am patriotic, it is just that the mutton here is especially fatty and I cant live without it :) Just joking again! Actually, being born here I consider destiny and that is not something to be taken lightly. Also, if I leave those I claim this, I claim that people would win without a fight; but again all this is too elaborate to explain for this purpose. Also I do a lot of work in Kelantan, so I cant leave it behind. No, not business, I do work in Wayang Kulit and other trance performance things. Yes, I am very interested in Malay things. Why? maybe my soul is Malay... Besides I like things that trance here and trance there. It is good to lupa (forget) yourself once in awhile :) Yes, back to my profession: I was a former journalist... Yes, sometimes I wrote on politics, sometimes I still do... No, not for any side but I dont trust politicians of any colour or stripe so I feel they should be made to answer hard questions and be accountable. Journalism does this, or is supposed to anyway. Yes, I do vote but am of the old school shh, undi itu rahsia (ballot is secret) type of idiot and will not declare any allegiances here. Hope you dont mind :) And no, in all my journalism I have not been an agent of any party of country, thought I wouldnt mind. I hear they get paid very well, wear very nice suits and easily get girls. But no has offered me... Again, just joking ya :) I went to a Catholic Mission school as a boy, then was asked to leave because I think I hit someone on the head with a bottle. Why? Maybe he irritated me, but also because before I liked all this writing stuff I liked hitting people. After that I went to a Methodist school for naughty boys and girls before it became a very respectable school for very rich children. I was placed in the naughty boys and girls part. Catholic and Methodist, yes? No, I never became a Christian thought I love the songs, I love Jesus and I really loved the Bible. Why? I thought loving the songs, loving Jesus and loving the Bibles was enough. But mostly because I never saw the light and I didnt want people plastering my face on posters thanking God that the son of a famous man had seen the light. No-lah I dont have a police record, but almost! Not for beating people on the head. Yes, I have taken part in rallies but the near police record was not during any of those. It is because I tried to stop a pakcik from being beaten on the head when I was covering one. Yes, it was Reformasi time. Did I support AI. No, I supported Reformasi. Actually, it isnt the same thing. I supported Reformasi because I liked the word. Today? I still like the word but I dont think most reformasi-sts like the word as much :) Yes, I can see you are very confused so lets get back to this Facebook registration thing. I joined Facebook (reluctantly) in 2010 because my family and friends asked me. I am very happy here because I have reconnected with so many friends from many years ago and we can behave as if we have never grown up. I also like to tease my students, put funny things on my page then put lovely and inspiring things on my page. No, not motivational things... I dont get very motivated most of the time... but songs and poems... Yes, I love poetry, even try to write it. No, it isnt all about love, but sometimes. Well, I love poetry because a lot of it is about God... Yes, about God, about visions; but also about bodies and thighs... Yes, yes, essentially they are about the same things... Yes, we are digressing again; in answer to your questions - 1. Do I use bad language? Well, only when I am ecstatic. And that is because I love bad language, it is so delicious! :) 2. Have I ever insulted the King? No, because the King is an institution and No. 2 on the Rukunegara list (which my father helped devise) so it would be stupid. By this we DONT mean reasonably critical ya, but insulting, because there is a difference... Besides, there are LAWS to deal with such acts arent there that dont include involving the Facebook accounts of everyone... No, I havent been reasonably critical on my Facebook either. 3. Have I ever insulted any religion or race? No, because to do that would be crude and disrespectful, and I was not brought up that way. Only that Bosnian sperm woman but that too was not racial just a socio-anthropological deconstruction of what it means to possess cultural self loathing. What does that mean? Never mind, lets just say it wasnt insulting. Well, at least not in the way you understand insulting. Thats all? I can keep my Facebook account? But you will be watching? Yes, please do. Lots of schoolboy banter, wayang kulit, irritated thoughts about politics and our politicians of all stripes and colours, ecstatic bad language, thoughts of God, poems about bodies and thighs and all the complicatedness that comes with being me. Thats really all I have to offer. Thank you! p.s: oh yes, and when it wasnt so confusing to get on I use to play Facebook Scrabble. These days I just answer those stupid quizzes, the last one of which said I should have been born a Mongol, which surely beats being Eliza Doolittle :) Thank you again! Pauline Fan Lilianne Fan Farish A Noor RS Murthi Christine May Yong Tse Yin Lee Anne Louis Han Fei Khairul Annuar Zainudin J Amy Emeelea Karl Rafiq Nadzarin Izni Disney-Rahim Jonathan Bong Wong Horngyih Shaira Danzig Amira Agnes Hanying Ong Mahesan Selladurai Dina Zaman Arlene Tan Mish NiKohl Dadhyanna Tan Mian Lee Shafiqa Nabeera Sharyn Lisa Shufiyan Shaila Koshy Noor Azam Shairi Noelle Lim Wan Saiful Wan Jan Mohd Anis Md Nor Bernice Chauly Bert Tan Mavin Khoo Navina Evans Brinthan Nanthabalan-Brinho Bino Rathod Danny Lim Tricia Yeoh Su-Wern Izan Tahir Manap Semenanjung
Posted on: Sun, 10 Aug 2014 17:13:10 +0000
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