Another tough night. I think now that the newness is wearing off and the kids are getting comfortable they are starting to really process and feel. I have a strong suspicion that Mr 4 has a behavior/developmental disorder. There are issues that I cant categorize as normal even taking into account their recent experiences and struggles. We also found out that Mr 7 has had numerous issues at school this last year, although his problems seem like they are probably directly related to his unstable home life. They are also manageable with a little research and feedback from his teacher. Ms 9 cried herself to sleep tonight due to a hurt knee that I believe she probably did actually hurt, but that also is not that bad. I think she misses her mom. Ms 12 and I have had more than one talk about her need to boss the other kids and I have tried to reassure her that I am capable of handling the parenting. I told her to try to trust me and that she has permission to just be a kid. The 3 older kids and I have also had a good talk about how important tone of voice is when we(they) talk to each other. They tend to snap and argue a lot. I gave them a few examples and got smiles and laughs when I demod walking in a room and saying Heeey in a Hey girl, whats up tone, and then walking in a room and saying HEY with an accusatory nasty tone. Same words, different tone, two completely different messages. Hopefully that will be a reminder I can use when they start getting snippy with each other. My boys are starting to feel the strain. They are quick to tears and super sensitive right now. My sis and Ky will be staying this weekend to help so I hope to get a little one on one with the boys. I am a little concerned about the kids seeing their mom this weekend. They definitely need mama time, but I worry that after seeing her, being back here will be tough(er). Darin and I are both starting to feel a little frazzled too. He had to stop by my work today to pick something up and it felt like I havent seen him in years even though we have been doing this together the whole time. If we continue to take other kids through Safe Families after this, we are going to have to be careful about how many at a time and that we get breaks in between and during. I feel really solid about what we are doing and how it can help, but I also dont want to over do it at the expense of our marriage or have it hurt our kiddos. Praying for the wisdom to know when we have to pull back or take a break will have to become a priority. Having said all that, I am still feeling confident that a good nights sleep will help us tackle tomorrow, and I am still having no regrets.
Posted on: Fri, 06 Jun 2014 05:22:10 +0000
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