Baby,i woke up this morning an i couldnt stop the tears from - TopicsExpress

Baby,i woke up this morning an i couldnt stop the tears from falling.I miss u so much,an it hurts.Dis pain is cutting me deep.Knowing that yesterday was the last time i would stroke ur face,an kiss ur lips.I feel like my heart was in that casket with u.I will never love again.I know ur in a better place,but im selfish,i want u here wit me.Its like i have to live this nightmare,an ur not here to wake me up,an tell me everything gone be okay.U never know how serious death is,until it takes somebody close to u.I used to wonder how u was so strong,but over this last week i saw how.Ur mom Natasha Ballard is so strong an she was holding it together for all of us.Damn baby,it wasnt ur time to go wtf!!!! Imma just have to take it one day at a time.Everybody keeps telling me time heals all things.Honestly,thats the last thing im trying to hear.Nobody knows how special u was to me..We had plans baby,bigger than the human eye could see.I dont know how im gonna get past this.U are my otherhalf,my bestfriend,an my king.I will never forget about u..We laid u to rest yesterday,an i tried to stay strong.But when they lowered u down,covered u up,an closed that casket,i wanted to die.I wasnt ready for dat at all.I sit an read all the letters u wrote me when u was locked up,an they bring a temporary smile to my face, until i get finished reading.Then reality hits me that now all i have is memories..I smell ur clothes,because it makes me feel like ur around in a sense.I lay in our bed an hug ur pillow,i just want u back baby...I go to sleep only to dream about u,i wish i could live in my dreams because ur always there.IM LOST BABY,PLEASE SHOW ME THE WAY.I CANT DO THIS ON MY OWN.I MISS U SO MUCH,I JUS WISH U WAS HERE TO HOLD ME.I LOVE U MAINE!!!!Dont be mad at me baby,im trying to be strong.Its just so hard without u being here to be like STOP DONT DO IT UH UH,WIPE UR EYES.U will live on in my heart forever.GIVE ME KISS MWAHH,IN UR WORDS STOP PLAYING WIT ME GIVE ME A REAL KISS.I KNOW U UP THERE WATCHING OVER ME AN I CAN DIG DAT!!!!

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