Because the cancer cells that were in my lung undoubtedly spawned the cancer removed from my spine (though they inexplicably somehow in no way identify with each other anymore that stuff that was in my back was particularly nasty and aggressive) --- I am by medical definition a stage 4 cancer patient and now thus a cancer stage 4 survivor. I have found myself inadvertantly connected with pathologists here who were apparently willing to offput to my continued speedy PT/spine rehab recovery to reprove a cancer connection between my lung and spine, or prove the existence of another cancer in me, yet to no avail. My personal oncologists and their team say it is a very uncommon case, attracting increasing interest. And they too have been extremely frustrasted with getting results out of Pathology. Without saying a mumbling word along the way, I have submitted to pathologys head-to-toe medical probe of my body to help them make sense of this phenomenom and I really have no desire to discuss this aspect of this case with anyone ever again--unless it will somehow help them. It might be a good case for a teaching institution such as this to painstakingly research, but theyll have to do so without me as a research hostage--I have to move on. Someone up there in pathology might pray for a revelation--smile: (Proverbs 4:7) Wisdom is the principle thing, therefore get wisdom, and in all thy getting, get understanding. After another MRI was ordered yesterday, I snapped and refused to do it or any further medical procedures, until i spoke to my dr.-- nothing, not an asprin. Of course my nurse was not the problem, continued to cooperate with her. and not to ruin her day, so I asked her to page my doctor because i was not doing another MRI. I have now been out of icu for 11 days and kept from needed PT/OT consistent in-patient treatments already scheduled in DC by a pathology department in whom I have no confidence -- and whose dictates I would no longer follow and I believe my steps were ordered and confirmed by a friend (Linda Dylla) who is very experienced in these insituitonal matters. I could have used my oh know dey deh-ent, voice to tell my dr. If i didnt have great insurance i would have been long gone (maybe not so true here) and after having now given 3 biopsy samples to pathology--they want another mri picture. Please! I told him i am refusing any and all additional procedures, that do not relate directly to my PT and I will call my wife and leave right now if I am not cleared by pathology to begin further healthcare, based on a patient-centered model. I am in a hospital and not being treated at all. Thats not right and my condition is physical condition of my feet and legs is getting worse, established during your rounds this morning ( this morning i have regained that lost ground working by myself overnight) If your path team cannot settle on a conclusion, they need to send my samples to Johns Hopkins or the Mayo Clinic who will (stole that from a friend, seemed very Liz Taylor cat on a hot tin roof-ish, of me.) He grabbed at his belt, his pager then went off and he reads to me: path lab says they will have rush final report ready tomorrow -- thats today, saturday. Rush my As-pergum! (I later called the rehab to confirm my bed is still there-- its indeed secure) ....and by the way, my childhood friend, high school friend, college friend, frat brother (iota phi theta), LA, CA roommate, rio de janeiro and many other roadtrip ride-or-die co-hort, Joseph Steve Eure, got here about the same time as my doctor with 2 lbs of still warm steamed shrimp -- and waited in the hall for us. (We later stank it uppppp, like low tide in my private room, had a ball) Meanwhile, a thoracic surgeon and resident walked into my room-- no cutting on you...Looks like that thing in your chest will likely easily dissolve. I could find someone to cut it out, but they would be the kind of dr. I wouldnt do business with, He said, half smiling. How could he know this without pathology not knowing, that all they needed to put on the long awaited report for my transfer to rehab hospital was chemo and radiation, starting in 2-4 weeks Folks, that is all the dc facilty basically needs to see on this Final Report from pathology to admit me. So its been established out here in the flippin hallways, where is the white smoke from the path lab chimney? I ultimately agreed yesterday to an mri of my spine to check my titanium surgical spine work, because i want to know after two weeks that it looks good to my doctor--in fact its already done! I was left in the hall for over an hour after the mri, but at least I was full of shrimp, was not hungry and did not care-- smile! By the way, I apologized to my dr. that he had to bear the brunt of my verbal revolt. Hes been so great. He said, if he were me, he would have gone off, last week and apologized tobme. Well, there is more to this info dump. Its Common knowledge that the Fed govt has reopened and my federal govt contract handler contacted me on Friday about my beginning my work next week at the Dept of Commerce National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) Office of Marine and Aircraft Operations (OMAO), with its fleet ofv12 research ships, 9 aircraft, including those fierce hurricane hunters that fly into oceanic storms, and the NOAA commissioned corps. Primarily among my duties: I will design, build, and maintain social media platforms across all OMAO channels within this agency nationally(with offices and outposts from Alaska to Boulder (colo), to my hometown of Norfolk, VA, etc.and serve as OMAO social media HQ rep; represent OMAO Communications at NOAA working groups/exhibits, etc.-- based in Silver Spring, MD.; To my surprise,On friday sept 28 in my car on my way home from a bid-ness meeting deep in southern md, I got a call from a lady whom I didnt know in Sacramento representing NOAA contractor which i had heard of to fill this job. I pulled over and listened-- cool, that sounds like a fun challenge, thank you very much! The Catch was, her paperwork had to be in to NOAA by the following Monday morning. 3 days, and only three names were going to be submittted. Turned out The only one who opted to do an actual proposal to do the work using the SWOT model and NOAA realtime data and photos with their paperwork was your boyeee. (Thanks Cathy Oriordan my former colleague at the American Institute of Physics for the SWOT immersion.) (2nd Timothy 2:15) Study to show thyself approved a workman who need not be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. Eventually got the call from my handler, you got the contract, she said. What, I got it? thank you Lord, oh and thank you too! Wow! I said. (James 1:17) Every good gift and every perfect gift comes from above and comes down from the Father of Lights... But oh snizzap, now I cant walk and have missed an entire week of OT, messing with these umd pathologists. (Psalm 23) The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want... Ironically it was the ride to OMAO that lead to the spine cancer emergency episode. I was on the way to the original first meeting with the top brass there on Oct 1st, the first day of the govt shutdown, thus no meeting was held, but my attempted drive there, pushed the spine cancer to a tipping point where i could feel something pinch in my back on that day, leg numbness and foot tingling on wednesday and nearly complete waist-down paralysis by friday. Anyway, my handler and I spoke yesterday, she had no idea what has been going on with my health-- and of course is floored. She asked do you still want to do the job under the circumstances. No question about it, I said. I said the average stay in this spine rehab is 22 days, I will do it 12 days, but get me 30 days to officially report. My handler likes the idea and has floated a NOAA weather ballon up the chain. Well see and review by phone next week, about this period of uninterrupted spine/leg rehab for me, that I will definitely begin within hours. But in any case, i am not worried or anxious about this in the least bit. Not going to hurt myself over this. I will end up where God wants me to be, henceforth, and evermore frosty! (2nd Corinthians 12:9) ...He said unto me, my grace is sufficient for you, Gods strength is made perfect in my weakness. Big meetings for Anna Davalos at our company Alejo Media upcoming up too! We are all too blessed to stress! I really must take a short break from writing during the coming few days to get resettled into my new in-patient digs. Your prayers, your encouragement, and in some cases your understanding and restraint (i dont want to be seen like this) has made a tremendous positive difference in this still brand new journey. Kim and my younger kids (candace and Trey) will be up after gymnastics this morning. I havent seen Trey since october 4th, hell be 4 on Halloween. Candace was up here last week, being silly like her daddy. My eldest son, stephen is flying in from Charlotte today to take care of me -- haircut, etc, and to relieve his sister, khera, who has been her fathers primary keeper during this blessed fortnight of pain and redemption. (Psalm 23:4) yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death (paralysis and two cancers) I WILL FEAR NO EVIL, for Thou art with me (with a plan for me to pass fearlessly through all manner of tricky wiles) Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me... No doubt, I will use a rod (walker), and a staff (cane) in the short run, and a wheel chair, as i have bogarted one around here to comfort me. But you will see me dancing the wobble (real cool looking too-smile) at somebodys wedding and way before that, shouting on my feet Glory to God! at somebodys church-- if it is His will, cuz im ready to GIT R DONE! Thank you Lord for the gift of this shut down, you said i will stand again and whether thats literally or symbollically, I will stand for you in in this world -- thy will be done. Bless these your people --oh God -some i know/knew well, some hardly or not at all, with effective prayers dear Lord, and a claim to fearless peace. Use me Lord as a doorway to fearless faithful living,bless any who stood up for me and my family in any small way, Lord! Bless them real good Lord for looking after your silly servant and his family. Bless those who might not have a rooting interest in me Lord or may find fault in your servant and find me unaccepitible in some way, for any number of Good reasons, please feel free to bless them to see you in me and not me, because you know Lord, better than all of them that I am still a hot mess, and not very religious---but faith walking in your miraculous grace, will show all who will hear, in Jesus name its ok to pray,and that doesnt make you angry at all. Amen. And to you all, my soaring humanoid potpourri, i am not sure if ill have anything else to say worth hearing, but ill be back soon to try to write it--i owe you to try to. Love, Jim I will cry tears of joy over you all and your kind words, FB likes,babysitting, general interest, song posts and many other acts of kindness next week-- (with tears streaming down my cheeks now) but not yet--cant let go just yet! Really looking forward to visitors the sunday affer one week of rehab, I think.
Posted on: Sat, 19 Oct 2013 13:00:39 +0000
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