Can you date too many people at one time? Some people go on a first date and, wow, the magic and the sparks are there immediately. But for others, they have to date someone many times, maybe even over weeks or months, to know whether there’s chemistry in the air—and they may need to date several people before they finally feel that “click.” If you immediately exclude all other guys or gals from the moment you have your first lunch date with someone until his or her annoying laugh causes you to bolt two months later, you may have to go through several mini-relationships in a row before you’re done. Just think of the time wasted! Going on dates with a few different good candidates around the same time helps you find out fast who’s wrong, without forcing you to wait and wait and wait to find out who’s right. Bu there can be a downside. When given so many choices, people have more trouble making any decision, and this sense of indecisiveness could lead to a cascade of negative effects. Choice overload can make you question the decisions you make before you even make them, it can set you up for unrealistically high expectations, and it can make you blame yourself for any and all failures. In the long run, this can lead to decision-making paralysis. And in a culture that tells us that there is no excuse for falling short of perfection when your options are limitless, too much choice can lead to clinical depression. The problem could be our quest for perfection. We all want to believe in The One - a person that meets every item on our relationship checklist, who’s our soul mate forever. But when you search for perfection, you’re unlikely to find it. People who attempt to make the perfect choice, whether it comes to buying a car or finding a partner, end up less satisfied, regardless of what or who they choose. That’s because they tend to look for flaws, and become disillusioned with all of their options. -Cnn
Posted on: Fri, 14 Mar 2014 19:32:30 +0000
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