Captain’s Daily Orders Noah’s Ark Subject: Do Not Bite the Hand That Feeds You!! I have had to speak to certain of the creatures aboard this vessel before on the subject of their behaviour. Yet again there have been incidents of violence committed by one group against the Captain and Mrs Noah. It is the smallest amongst you who are guilty of this unacceptable behaviour. Therefore I am now forced to formally issue the proclamation below. Any flying insect found guilty of biting the Captain or Mrs Noah will be subject to the death penalty. Sentences will be carried out at dawn, before the entire ship’s company, in the manner stated below. Guilty insects will first be subjected to gassing by Mrs Noah’s patented sleep gas. When unconscious, the guilty party(s) will be led on deck and restrained by a band of sticky tape to the cabin top. On the command given by the Captain, Mrs Noah will then proceed to batter the offending little pest(s) with her suitably black coloured, fly terminator. On completion of sentence the remains of the offender(s) will be despatched over the side without ceremony! You have been warned………DON’T BITE THE CAPTAIN OR MRS NOAH! Signed Noah Senior Admiral Great Flood Fleet
Posted on: Sun, 20 Jul 2014 10:38:28 +0000
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