Choosing to be Happy -- A Panguitch mom fighting cancer says some of the best medicine is a mixture of grace and work. Vonnie Parkin of Panguitch was happy. Married to Shawn, a dentist, with five children, her first grandbaby on the way, she had just welcomed one daughter home from an LDS mission while sending out another daughter on her LDS mission to Chile. The Idaho Falls native has a degree in Special Education and works with children with special needs at Panguitch Elementary. “I feel driven to do all I can to help those, especially little ones, who are in need,” says Vonnie. And it was there, while at work with those children, on an ordinary day in October of 2014, she noticed something hurt just a little; a small lump in her breast that felt tender “both inside and out.” “I was overdue for a mammogram by a couple of years, so I went to Dr. (Richard) Birch (at Garfield Memorial),” says Vonnie. “He did a routine exam, and then made an appointment in two weeks at Valley View for a diagnostic mammogram. We all didn’t think much of it. I don’t really have a history of breast cancer in my family, and my daughter had a small benign cyst removed when she was in high school so I thought it was the same thing for me.” During the two-week wait Vonnie read an article written by author and religious leader Sheri Dew called “What is Grace?” “The article says that sometimes we think of grace to only mean forgiveness, but that grace is so much more than that,” says Vonnie. “The article talks about how grace fills in the spaces caused by pain and despair; that it heals, strengthens, brings peace. And while I was reading that, a thought came to my head that said, ‘Vonnie, if you have cancer, you don’t have to go through it alone.’ And immediately I just felt this overwhelming, peaceful, comfortable feeling. That feeling has stayed with me from then until now. ” The day came to get tested at Valley View. Vonnie says, “I got the diagnostic mammogram, then an ultrasound. The radiologist and cancer staff at Valley View were so amazing, so careful and kind. The radiologist gently told me and Shawn that the lump did look like cancer, but he needed a biopsy to be sure. He called and found out, by a small miracle, the OR could take me in for a biopsy in an hour. What a tender mercy!” Vonnie says she had to laugh a little about what happened next. “We had dropped off our 9th grade son at the orthodontist while I had the ultrasound. While we waited to get the biopsy, Shawn picked him up and we talked to him about what the cancer center said, and then left our cell phone with him while I got my biopsy. When my oldest daughter called on it to ask what was happening, my son told her ‘Mom’s getting an autopsy!’” Vonnie laughs that the “results of that ‘autopsy’” came to Panguitch a few days later. “There was a knock at my front door, and it was Dr. Birch. He’d been watching for the results to come through, and as soon as he saw them, he brought them straight to me because he felt doing that over the phone wasn’t right. What doctor does that? Dr. Birch’s kindness meant the world to me.” The results: cancer. Dr. Birch was able to quickly get Vonnie into an appointment with a surgeon named Dr. Clark Rasmussen at Intermountain Medical Center in Murray, who decided to try and shrink the cancer first. Vonnie then met with Dr. William Nibley at the IMC Cancer Center, who spent an hour and a half with Vonnie, drawing pictures and carefully explaining the process. “Dr. Nibley said ‘I can’t tell you why this is happening, but I can tell you what is happening to you.’ He took the time to thoroughly explain things I had no idea about: chemotherapy, side effects, surgery. He said ‘If we do all this there’s a 99.5 percent chance your breast cancer will be taken care of.” Treatments include two types of chemotherapy, administered four times, and Vonnie has been traveling back and forth to Murray to get them, with two treatments left now. Through it all, one cannot help but notice a stark lack of self-pity and negativity. When talking to Vonnie, you hear things like: “You know after chemo, you do feel yucky for a few days, but, good thing you know it’s not going to last!” or “I’m very susceptible to germs and my youngest son has the flu, so he’s been living downstairs and I’ve been living upstairs. But it’s all good because he gets the Wii and I get the kitchen!” Talking with Vonnie there’s lots of laughter, goodwill, optimism, and occasional tears, but tears of gratitude. Vonnie says, “Sayings that used to seem kind of trite or corny now have a whole new meaning. For example the saying ‘I can do all things if God is with me.’ before my diagnosis was something I believed, but now it’s something I know. And even on the days I don’t feel very good, there’s something to be thankful for in every circumstance, and I can always find that when I look.” Vonnie says part of her nature was born to be optimistic, but that being happy really is a choice, and it’s work. Hard work. “I just got done reading a talk by (LDS leader) Jeffrey Holland called The Pursuit of Happiness. One thing he said that really resonates with me is that happiness is work. Negative thoughts enter our brain and you have to work to do positive things that help push the thought out. Reframing is one way. I could look at my upcoming chemo like ‘Oh no, I still have two more chemo treatments, and I’m going to get so sick.’ Or I could look at it like ‘Sweet! I’ll only have one more treatment after this!’ Same situation, different attitude. Dr. Birch says my attitude is one of the reasons I’m doing so well with my treatments.” As part of her cancer protocol, Vonnie has also taken the genetic test to see if she carries the cancer gene. The results will help her decide what the best surgery to undergo will be: lumpectomy; mastectomy; or the surgery made famous by Angelina Jolie, a preventative double mastectomy. Waiting for the results of the test, even in the face of this scary and difficult decision, Vonnie responds with “You know, after removing the cancer, they can do reconstructive surgery at the same time now, which is great!” And Vonnie Parkin of Panguitch is happy.
Posted on: Tue, 20 Jan 2015 18:33:29 +0000
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