Citing an article that said the average cost for a couple to attend the prom was (then) over $1000, a moderately well-off parent I vaguely knew once pushed hard for an out-of-town event that she anticipated would cost just a little more than that. Few students or their parents complained, so my own objection was viewed as misplaced liberal guilt. I am quite sure that some students do spend that much or more for prom; preparing for it can be a major adolescent life event. In my experience the big moment for the True Believer is The Arrival: with whom, wearing what, and in what vehicle. After that, its pretty much a high school dance, and you can probably recall or imagine that, for most kids, most such events are not gonna be quite as magical as one might have anticipated beforehand. No matter what the venue. Rarely is a student going to leap up and tell the world shed planned on having her grandma rework her quinceañera dress and taking the bus. Maybe followed, for the last 100 yards, by a horse and carriage that a cousin drives, and could slip her into for a few minutes -- if she was fortunate enough to have had a quinceañera, that cousin, and a talented grandma. Or be quick and/or lucky at the thrift stores. How many high school kids want to admit they have no way to get themselves out of town? Or say they cant miss that much work at a job their family relies on as a part of their essential income. Not to mention the variety of counterculture kids who want badly to attend, pretending they were somehow coerced into going, and sneering at it the whole time. Id like to hope it was only those last youngsters Super Mom had in mind when she insinuated that the prom would be more fun without SOME people, but I assure you a modern school event would be an even more tedious affair without those kids. The thing is, many kids take almost mythic pleasure in the anticipation phase -- and they could not even fantasize about spending over $1000 cash. Yes, people do sometimes offer ways around these obstacles, but not consistently, and many people are not comfortable having people know they are struggling. And they shouldnt have to. In the bigger picture, you should be grateful for those members of society who are unhappy about constantly receiving hand-outs. The people who are best at that sort of expecting others to provide for them tend to be whiny ingrates, anyhow. (First-hand experience talking here.) Anyone who cannot imagine that for real, nice, working people $1000+ might be an inconceivable sum -- or likewise the cost of being a cheerleader, or class trips, or field trips, or the increased cost of anything better -- should be very discreet and generous, get smarter, or defer to people who are. Youre annoyed that your kids are held back from more fantastic experiences by these poor kids? Then push for fair wages. The world will be a better place even when it isnt prom time.
Posted on: Sat, 27 Dec 2014 03:19:54 +0000
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