Confession time: Yesterday I was angry and acted childishly in private as a result. I wanted to justify it as righteous anger, but that was not the case. I was not focused on honoring or protecting Gods Kingdom in that moment. I was focused on selfish and soulful desires. I slipped into self-preservation mode and wrapped it in religious overtones in hopes of justifying. How silly. I got over myself pretty quickly. Much quicker than I used to which is a positive sign of growth in my life. A few commented that in my countenance they could see fatigue. When we operate in our own strength, regardless of how we may try to justify it, the effect on us and those around us will manifest. My prayer is that I learn from this and continue to grow. I refuse to wallow in self pity or condemnation. This is not penance or beating of myself. I stand forgiven and redeemed. I am thankful to God for loving and leading me. The greatest work of grace in a persons life is that of making them more like Jesus. The early church had the evidence of Gods grace at work in and through their lives in that they were living, speaking and acting like Christ Himself. That is my greatest desire. While I am not proud of this anger moment, I am reminded that even in my humanity God can reveal His divinity. I do not have to be Him, but if I accurately and humbly represent Him, then people will see Him more than they see me. I am thankful for Gods ongoing work.
Posted on: Wed, 14 May 2014 11:47:18 +0000
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