Continuation to My Journal by: Marilu Neri Custer I called up my daughter, Janyll, who works as nurse, at Kaiser Hospital in San Rafael, CA, USA; she works at oncology department for 6 years, and she specializes in chemo too. I was also very glad and blessed, that Janyll could really be a big help in the process of my operation and treatments. I told her about my breast cancer diagnosis. She asked me for my pathology report, but there was nothing. I told her that my oncologist will do the biopsy after my mastectomy. She totally disagreed on that idea. She called up my brother, Chris. And we started a three way conference meeting. We eventually decided on what we are going to do. The Breast and Cervical Cancer Treatment Program was offered to those whose income was not over $65,000.00 annually. I was definitely qualified for that program; which was under Marin General Hospital, at San Rafael, CA, USA; and partnered with Medical. This program was only available in California. What a blessing. When, I found out that I could be qualified under this program, I immediately told my husband about my plans. I needed to go back to the USA to get my treatments covered under Breast and Cervical Cancer Treatment Program; which partnered with Medical. For sure, this will help us financially, besides I will get the best medical treatment in the whole world. Without hesitations, my husband approved of my plan. Before, I received the bad news; I got a scheduled flight going back to the USA on August 11, 2013. To help my daughter and her family moved from her rental house, to their new acquired house. I was thinking that if I can get the soonest available flight to the USA, without paying much for my re booking, then this will be a good sign from God, that He wanted me to go. I did get my flight changed to July 27, 2013, without paying additional fee, for my re booking. That was indeed another blessing. Thanked God. Definitely, I took the flight the following day. I packed all my things within half day. Time was really limited. I needed to go as soon as possible, so I left my husband, sons, grandchild, closed relatives, friends, house, home, dogs behind and the street kid’s feeding ministry. I was so sad, and not even knowing when I can go back or if I will ever see my loved ones again. It was a difficult trip for me. Thanked God, I reached my destination, my daughter Janyll, James, my son in law, my son Jeremy; brother, Chris and Baby, picked me up at San Francisco International Airport. Though, I could not stop thinking on what will happen to me, to my husband and to my children. What if I will lose this battle? I did not have the answer; all I did was pray hard and trust God. While I was waiting for all my hospital appointments, I was asking God to show and guide me on what to pray. My friends and relatives asked me to pray for healing. But, I was not ready to ask God for healing yet, because I wanted Him to do His will for me. One day, I was thinking on the things that I will be needing after my mastectomy. I needed a wig for my bald head, beanies, hats, and comfortable camisoles, pajamas winter clothes and shoes. I was just really thinking of so much petty things. I started to pray, by counting my blessings and thanking God for providing me the medical insurance and a roof over my head. God gave me the faith and the confidence that He will provide me all my needs. I ended my prayer with thanksgiving and praise! After a few days, our church from Waterford, CA, Community Baptist Church, some of my friends, my children, husband and relatives sent help and brought me the things I needed. Almost everything was provided. I was really thankful and grateful to all my children, son in law, husband, friends, relatives and to God. It was amazing how God’s love manifested thru all my friends, family and relatives. I was really joyful in spite of the raging strong storm in my life. During my devotional time, God led me to the book of Matthew 6: 5; who said,” Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, what you will drink; or about you wear. Is not life more important than food and the body more important than clothes?” These really caught my attention. Honestly, I have read these verse a thousand times, but it never struck me this hard. And I said, yes, Lord! Life is more important than these. Then, I felt that God was directing me to pray for healing. I had goose bumps all over my body and I felt my heart beating with joy. I cried and there were tears of joy flowing from my eyes. I knew that God will definitely heal me. The following day, when I opened my Bible, in Psalm 91:16, God said: “With long life will I satisfy her and show her my salvation”. I started thanking God because I knew God wanted me to pray for a longer life. I also thanked God for leading and teaching me on what to pray. I thanked Him for another confirmation thru His words. This time, I was so confident that He will carry me all through this journey. On the third day of my devotional time, I was very emotional and tensed, because my chemo was scheduled the following day. Besides, all tests will also show if my cancer had spread out in some other parts of my body. It was a very stressful day for me. I was so worried about my chemo and the results of all my tests. It was just overwhelming. I was so anxious about everything. My faith and peace were like roller coasters. Slowly, I remembered all God’s revelations and promises to me. I heard His small voice telling me to calm down. Right there and then, I felt His arms embracing me so hard with love and grace. His presence and assurance was so felt that the peace of God was all over me again. On the fourth day of my devotional, God again directed me to Isaiah 41:9-10:1315:16; God said, “I took you from the ends of the earth; from its farthest corners I called you. I said you are my servant; I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your GOD. I will strengthen you and uphold you with my righteous right hand. For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, do not fear; I will help you. See, I will make you into a threshing sledge, new and sharp, with many teeth. You will thresh the mountains and crush them, and reduce the hills to chaff. You will winnow them, the wind will pick them up, and a gale, will blow them away. But you will rejoice in the Lord and the glory in the Holy One of Israel’’. All these revelations and promises prompted me to pray for healing. And trusted God that He will deliver me from this storm, restore my health and use me mightily in the coming years. I kept these words and the promises of God deep in my heart, thru all the time of my journey. His WORDS were my sole source of my strength in times of my sickness, my difficulties, discouragements, desperation, pains, loneliness, weaknesses and uncertainties. to be continued.....
Posted on: Sun, 29 Jun 2014 03:56:31 +0000
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