Conversation today... Its a little long, so if you wish not to read, I wont be mad. If you wish to comment, feel free. :-) Her: Jeremy, I read a while back on facebook that you have decided to stay single. Why? Me: Because Im unsuccessful in relationships. So, from now on, Im just going to be someones distraction. Her: What do you mean, distraction? Me: Meaning, because most people have super busy lives, whether its their job, family, or both, a relationship really doesnt fit well into their life. Something usually has to give to make the other work. Her: hmmm, being a distraction seems like a cop out Me: Not really. I mean, if you think about it, a distraction is all one really needs. For example, an amazing night or weekend with one person that you genuinely enjoy spending time with. Thats awesome. Because the rest of your life is kind of monotonous, but required. Its the same thing day in and day out. Her: But what if the girl wants to integrate the guy into her life, like introduce him to her family, friends, kids, etc? Me: Does the girls family, friends, and kids, suffer if they never meet the guy? Her: Well, no. Their family relationship will most likely stay the same. Me: Now, lets say he does meet the family, friends, and kids and the guy and girl eventually break up. Could they potentially suffer then? Her: I suppose they could if they put time into the relationship with the guy. Me: And there you have the reason why I think being a distraction is the best way to go. That way both the girl and the guy get to live life on their terms, but when they want to enjoy the other persons company, they can. Her: Oh Jeremy, you just want your cake and eat it too. Me: That would only be true if the girl wasnt enjoying the situation as well. You see, being the distraction is what brings excitement into the girl AND the guys life. That same excitement tends to stop existing when life between the guy and girl involves doing daily chores. Her: But relationships show commitment, and thats something Im looking for. Me: Commitment doesnt really exist. Its just you believing what the other person says. Your belief doesnt really hold the other person to doing it, whether its the girl or guy. So taking away the commitment, eliminates that fear of loss and opens the door to enjoying life. Besides, is a relationship the be-all and end-all? Her: Thats what Ive always been taught. The goal was to find a man, get married, have kids, and live happily ever after. Me: Unfortunately, in my opinion, that life is extremely difficult to find. I would rather concentrate my efforts on the things that make me happy. Her: Well isnt that selfish of you. Me: Depends on your definition of selfish. I happen to believe you arent being selfish if youre doing things that directly make YOU happy. You ARE being selfish if youre asking other people to do things to make yourself happy, regardless if they are happy too. Her: Never thought of it that way. Me: Glad I could help. :-)
Posted on: Sat, 10 Jan 2015 04:53:08 +0000
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