Crazy girl... thats me. Dreamed all night. Part of it was about trying on shoes with my Bobby. I got up to go to the bathroom, laid back down and fell right back into that dream. Guess I had Little Mamas house shoes on the brain. I took yet another pair to her this morning to try on and they didnt fit either. I went up a size and got them in wide and her feet are so swollen they wouldnt even go in those. So... theyre going back and I start all over. Ill find some. Eventually. When I got to LMs care center I found her in the sun room. Thats just off the beauty shop and shed just gotten her hair done. I took a picture of her sitting on the little settee, looking at a People magazine Id taken to her and eating some M&Ms that I also took to her. She looked up and caught me taking the picture, thus the fact that her eyes are nearly shut and shes talking... telling me dont take that picture. LOL I did anyway. She healing on her face finally. She asked about everyone. Wanted to know where her next class was, tattled on one of the residents (a man) who pushed his walker in and out of the sun room. Boy, the minute he rolled in she got this disgruntled expression on her face and said, Oh, hes an old Myrtle. It was all I could do not to laugh. I didnt ask her what that meant because I think she was trying to come up with a different word and thats all that came out. She said that this morning she had him in class and that he got caught in a lie and so he owned up to and said he brought it on himself. Oh.. the world in her head is so discombobulated and screwy and its always full of discord. Rarely is she ever happy about stuff, but then thats sort of how she was with us as kids. She was all business. The few times I can remember her playing with us, she was also constantly telling us what we were doing wrong as we played. LOLOLOL She just had to teach...all day...to whoever was around and I guess shes still doing it. Those little people in the care center have no idea that to my LM, they are her students. She kept asking me where her purse was and that she needed to get back to class, so I walked her to the dining room, told her it was time for lunch and kissed her goodbye. She said, okay, then looked up at me with this really lost, really blank look on her face and said...what am I doing here? I said, this is where youre going to eat lunch. Okay, she said again as I hugged her and left. Today, she wasnt afraid and she wasnt in pain. For her, I call that a good day. Walk through the world in confidence. Even if youre uncertain of what youre doing or where you are, keep your chin up and your steps sure. The quickest way to failure is letting the world see your fear.
Posted on: Thu, 15 Jan 2015 20:40:20 +0000
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