DO YALL EVEN KNOW ABOUT HONEYCRISP APPLES? Oh, today youre gonna learn. Ive never been a big apple fan. I mean, theyre OKAY. When I was a kid, I only ever cared to stomach them with the skin peeled off (only my sweet grandma would ever oblige me this way) and these days, I never really buy them; but if I do, they assuredly will have caramel sauce or peanut butter to accompany them (did I mention they MUST also be sliced first? Thats right, apples- Im not messin around here). Well, Ive really been trying to cut carbs as much as possible, so Ive been buying more fruit than usual (I like fruit, but not as much as I like chips or Honey Maid Grahamfuls- seriously, have you tried those? NO? Youre missing out). So on my last trip to the grocery store, I decided to switch it up a little and buy some apples. Im more of a kiwi/mango/pear/berries person, but whatever. I could use a little apple with my peanut butter. So I picked up two spunky little Jazz apples, because theyre about the size I can stomach. And then I saw them. The coveted Honeycrisp apples. Which, by the way, are about the size of a chinchilla and cost almost $4 a pound. Ive heard a little about these apples. Mostly just that theyre...good. I dont know. Im not acquainted with many fruit connoisseurs. But for $4 bucks a pound, they have to be pretty tasty, right? Ah, what the hell. Ill try a $2 (plus some change) apple. It looks like it could feed a small family. Being oh-so-apathetic towards apples, its taken me over a week to tackle my monster. I had one of the Jazz apples a while back...it was anticlimactic. And required more peanut butter than I was willing to stomach (I love the stuff, but 100 calories a tablespoon?! GET REAL, JIF). I was even more reluctant to try my Honeycrisp, despite my curiosity, due to its size (remember- chinchilla). I knew I wasnt gonna want to eat the whole thing, but leftover apple turns all brown and icky and UGH. I didnt want to deal with it. But today was the day. I sliced that bad boy up, rationed out my peanut butter, and took the plunge. I decided to taste it in its pure form before I dipped it. Just to get the true Honeycrisp experience, which couldnt possibly be THAT good, could it? CUT SCENE TO HEAVEN IN MY MOUTH. Heres the thing with the Honeycrisp- it appeals to all five senses. First, you have sight- it is a beautiful thing to behold. Large, glowing, a perky blush-and-golden-yellow marbling flushing its crisp skin. Then, touch- its full and heavy in your hands...reminiscent of the apple that poisoned Snow White, but with zero undertones of darkness. It feels like a single rich, bountiful harvest in your hands. Hearing is next- whether you crunch into it directly with your teeth, slice it with a knife, snap pieces with your hands, or gently nibble a slice, the sound of its flesh breaking to reveal the nectar-like juices within is sharp, crisp, and refreshing. Once youve cut into it, take a whiff- the smell is sickeningly sweet, but fresh, and pure. Finally, TASTE. Ive never had a juicier apple, and the juiciness is not a compensation for its flavor. Its bursting with it. Its almost indescribable, but it lives up to its name- the crunch in every bite is irresistible, and its sweet like honey. I had to put the peanut butter away, because 1. the juiciness of the apple would have diluted it and 2. the sweetness is OVERWHELMING as-is. This apple holds its own, and Im sorry for having doubted it. I was ashamed to have already put peanut butter on my plate. This is like a Midas apple- without the, you know, inedibility. My mind has been blown. I can definitely say that Im a fan of the Honeycrisp, and this magnificent work of man and his genetic-twisting abilities is worth every penny. You cant even really put a price on what is essentially a fine art. Thanks for the ride, sweet apple. In this case, ignorance was not bliss- Honeycrisp, youve changed me.
Posted on: Mon, 31 Mar 2014 20:50:15 +0000
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