Dear DAIRY its Sunday. YEAH I KNOW I HAVENT BEEN AROUND FOR A WHILE WALL. Quite a bit has been happening since I saw my little bricks last. People have gone on holiday and come back, some have left the bleep factory for good, some are eating lavender cream cakes and surviving, some have lost their marbles, some have gone up the pole and some have drank an awful amount of Costa Coffee. Its been a virtual feast of ammunition for my wall and it starts with my longest serving member Mad Annie the Bleep. Do you know what...? She only travelled all the way into Bristol to go singing in the rain, well I ask you, really...? All she had to do is stick her head out of her lounge window and give us all a bit of Nessun Dorma and then she could honestly say shes been singing in the rain. Theres absolutely no need to go into Bristol; it all seems a bit frivolous to me. Whats wrong with Paulton rain anyway eh? Not arf...? Ive made an executive decision while Ive been going through my quiet period. I have changed the name of one of my little bricks in the wall from Zooming Zoe to Zoe the Fluff. It would appear from recent photographs here on Plugpoint that she is amassing copious amounts of belly button fluff. Periodically she scoops this out of her belly button and collects it in a used jam jar (cleaned out of course or the fluff would become quite sticky and we cant have that can we...yuk?) Ive suggested that if she took up a new interest like pole dancing or the like she could rub the bully button fluff into her hands and this would help her grip the pole much better. I am full of useful tips like this. Result...! Then theres that Lesley Orriiblechair who completely ignored my wave when I saw her in Silver Street on Saturday. See see see...shes only been gone a few weeks as shes forgotten me already. Sad...! Now Naughty Fay has just come back from a week in Tenerife. Its an island I love to visit myself so before Naughty Fay left Bristol I emailed my good friend the lady Mayor of Tenerife Señora Consuelo Una Paloma Blanca and warned her of Naughty Fays approach. She immediately alerted the Garda Nacionales who were on stand by for the duration of the holiday. Anyway it seems the holiday went off without a hitch but the lady Mayor was grateful for my advanced warning. Ahem...! It seems that Kevin the Voice has lost his marbles. I advised him to go to Hamleys in Oxford Street. They have a huge range of marbles of all colours and sizes and I am sure he could build up his stocks quite easily. Zoom...! It is with some sadness that I have to report that Zoe the Zip has left the bleep factory to take up another job. I wish her well in her venture and will miss her happy face at our bleep stations. I hope shell stay tuned in to my page and make her own comments. Another sad...! I hear the south coast has completely run out of Costa Coffee and I can guess the reason why. I am not naming any names here but Im sure all my little bricks will guess who is responsible for this phenomena. Can your milkman recommence deliveries to Naughty Fay and Jo Jo Bleep and if he picks up any stray marbles on his round will he kindly pass these on to Kevin the Voice who is a bit short at he moment. Got to sign off now as her indoors recons the lightening has knocked off the Sky TV again.
Posted on: Sun, 10 Aug 2014 17:23:50 +0000