Dear Will, Thank you for giving us an opportunity to review your portfolio of work. We regret to inform you that we do not see you attending our prestigious writing program. Do not be discouraged. There are truly memorable moments in your work. However, they are marred by poor diction and glaring surface errors. We point these out not to be cruel, but to provide constructive criticism. In your overly long play about the Danish prince, you note the question, to be or not to be. Since to be verbs are always transitive, they require a subject complement to be complete. This inexplicable omission makes the entire point moot. It is as though there is no explanation for what might come after. In the sonnet you wrote about white lies, we were impressed by the pun at the end, but what are we to make of these lines: But wherefore says she not she is unjust? And wherefore say not I that I am old? Come on now! How many negatives can you cram into a sentence? We got the impression of someone saying love is an overly complex, often contradictory, emotion. Those are at the sentence level. Have you ever heard of unity of time and space? That Tempest play seems to have been made up completely! Where is the Greek version? Oh, and who includes a stage direction about a bear?!? Like we said, we are not trying to be cruel. We are certain that a man of your social standing can find a job as a shop clerk or plague body remover. We wish you well, Hollywood Upstairs Literary Academy
Posted on: Wed, 29 Oct 2014 15:31:53 +0000
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