Do you ever wonder about how you are raising your kids -- the example you set for them, the values that you want to inculcate, the balance between directing, control and free will? It has been said that being a parent is the only job where when one finally knows what hes doing, hes out of a job. In truth, I am not sure that parents ever really know what they are doing -- or are ever out of job. The job is constantly evolving. The role of a parent is to make his child independent -- to nurture the self-confidence, transmit values, encourage self-motivation. We need to do our best to give our children what they need to grow and succeed in life. We wont always be there. Lori Palatnik once said, Hold their hands so that they can walk, let go so that they can run and cheer so that they can fly! The formula is simple in theory: Just give your children love, security, trust, joy in life, gratitude, values, motivation, direction. However, as every parent knows, try as one might, success is often out of our hands. One does his best to be a good example, to control his own anger and passions, and to provide an atmosphere that nurtures the values that one holds dear. Where you choose to live, the school you send your children, after school activity groups, your synagogue and community participation -- all have an important impact on how your children develop. Education is comprised of learning information and values, understanding how to analyze and apply what one learns, and the development of sound, solid habits. If one develops the habit of brushing and flossing each night, the question of whether one should skip a night is no longer a question; this habit will hopefully reduce cavities and maintain oral health. Likewise, with attitudes for life, one must build good habits which will strengthen belief and outlook. The Torah is an instruction book for life. The very word Torah means instruction. The Torah is often called Torat Chaim meaning Instructions for life. The purpose of the commandments, the mitzvot, are the means to fulfill Gods will which will help us as human beings lead more meaningful, happier lives. There are two mitzvot, commandments, our Torah heritage directs us to fulfill which help develop joy in life and gratitude as well as trust and security. The first mitzvah is at the very beginning of the day and the second is at the very end of the day. The fulfillment of these are two gifts for a successful life. Upon opening ones eyes in the morning, a Jew gives thanks for being alive and expresses gratitude to the Almighty by saying the Modeh Ani -- I am thankful before You, Living and Everlasting King, that you have returned to me my soul with compassion. Great is Your faithfulness! By training oneself -- and ones children -- to say this each morning is instilling an appreciation for life and a gratitude to the Almighty for life itself and what happens to us in life. At night, the last mitzvah of the day is to say Kriat Shema al HaMita -- Reading of theShema before going to sleep. At very minimum, one says the Shema -- Hear O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is One -- the first paragraph following the Shema and the blessing HaMapil. The blessing is one of trust in God and request that He watch over and protect us while we sleep. While the prayers are usually said in Hebrew, one may say the prayers in English. Most Siddurim, prayer books, have Modeh Ani and Kriat Shema al HaMita in them. Children are often afraid of the dark and of the unknown of going to sleep. One can appreciate how comforting it is to children to have a nightly ritual of saying the Shema and a prayer to the Almighty to protect them.
Posted on: Thu, 25 Dec 2014 16:31:19 +0000
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