Down days seem to be the hardest. Its flip-flopped. Sitting still use to bring the most relief. Being busy and focused seems to help now but does it really? Sitting still is when I process. I have to feel. I have to understand. And sometimes I have to get angry, cry, and stomp my feet. Mostly I pray. I ask questions and wait for answers - for those original thoughts of inspiration that create peace in my soul. What would I do without that? I cant even imagine. I dont want to imagine. Just grateful. Lots of talk, it seems, as to whether there is a god or not. Lots of sincere struggles. Desperate people needing, longing for answers but unsure they will ever come. How do you know when you get answers? How do you get answers? For me, the bottom line is peace that the Spirit brings. Am I making it too simple? Is turning to God asking Him for help too simple? I think it is simple. But Ive been doing it for a while, too. How did you learn? I learned by having a sincere desire to know Him, asking Him for help to learn, reading the scriptures, and not giving up. Im so grateful. I truly am. I KNOW why parents of suicide victims have taken their own life. And Ive seen it twice now. I get it. If I didnt get answers from Heavenly Father that settle my anguish, Id think about it too. Instead, Im grateful. Doesnt mean I dont hurt. Its hard to explain the sweet sacred experience of being in so much pain and yet feeling safe and held. Thats available to anyone certainly not just me. And its not just me and God. Its me and soooo many prayers, so much love, so much good. But, I really believe that if I didnt have the blessing at this time of such wonderful support, if it were just me and God, Id be okay. But hey, dont leave me. ;-)
Posted on: Tue, 13 Jan 2015 21:38:52 +0000
Trending Topics
Recently Viewed Topics
© 2015