Drumroll, barking and squealing please... I has got to the very acutal final of the National UK Blog Awards. I is now going to be judged by hexperts. This is quite actually concerning for me because I do not be knowing if hexperts know anyfink about Worzels. They has 5 fings they are looking at and I did be thinking maybe they need some help with understanding Mr Worzel Wooface Gummidge. 1. Design - A Worzel should be very actually fast and ideally have 4 legs. 3 is ok but a bit very wobbly when going slow. I do has 4 legs. A Worzel should have ears wot do has a life of their own and a soppy face for getting out of trouble. He should like having hadventures and taking up too much very actual space on the bed. But, I isnt one of them designer dogs, in very actual fact I was made in a back yard and left there to be attacked by an olderer dog until Hounds First Sighthound Rescue did come and save me. I do be hoping the judges will not be too concerned about my start in life and that I do not have a label or a pedgree. 2. Style - I has great style and I has a prize to very actually prove it. I was best dog over 16 inches at a show in the summer so I has got a tificate and everyfink. I is brilliant at lying upside down with my legs in the air wot is very important for being a Worzel. 3. Content - I is not too sure how the hexperts plan to check on my contents and mum has promised nobody will be rummaging around in my insides. But I can tells them I am a raw fed dog wot eat proper stuff and not brown kibble balls of sugar and other yucky stuff. Currently my contents include a dried tripe treat for being a good boy and becoming a finalist. I is hoping they will be overlooking the 2 kindles, 3 pairs of glasses and several books which also have made their way into my contents. 4. Marketing - I am very actually worried about this bit. I are not allowed in many shops and I does not understand about money. I dont have pockets you see so it isnt very quite important. Mum says that I has got it wrong and there is another kind of marketing wot is telling everyone about me. I is VERY good at that. I is a friendly boykin wot does say hello nicely to everyone I meet. Unless they is wearing flip-flops and then I will be not happy. I hope the hexperts do not be wearing flip-flops. Or there might be very actual quite trouble. 5. Usability - I fink I are user friendly. I are definitely friendly. I do lots of stuff very well. I do being a dog brilliantly. So, if the hexperts are looking for a dog we will be ok. If they is looking for a car or a kettle then I arent very useful in that department. I do running and jumping and getting mud on the sofa very quite well. I do being a good friend to mum exerlently and I do make lots of mess and washing like wot all good dogs should do. But, I fink the SIT fing might come back to annoy me again. Mum says being able to go sit is part of usability. I do fink this is tosh and mum do be using this as a very actual excuse to get me to do it more oftener. I fink I will be gettering a cold prickly bum over the next few months. I hope the hexperts do notice and give me brownie points for it. I do be hoping this helps the hexperts understand Worzels. Do you fink there is anything else they should very actually know?
Posted on: Mon, 15 Dec 2014 09:50:36 +0000
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