Environment “Hi Ram, how was your day?” Ram’s wife Sheila asked him as he returned home after a grueling day. “What do you expect?” Ram said gruffly. “I just...” Shiela decided to drop the question. Ram was always in a bad mood these days. “Could I get a glass of water at least?” Ram said in an annoyed tone. “I will get it,” Shiela replied. “I am just plainly tired of you.” Ram said aloud as his wife went to fetch water for him. “Here,” Shiela said returning with a glass of water. Ram gulped down the water in one go and sneered at his wife, “Isn’t it common for me to have two glasses? Are you that plain stupid?” “That’s enough,” Shiela said her patience wearing out. “Don’t you walk out on me like that,” Ram said at his wife’s back as she tried to leave the room. “Now, do I have to take your permission for everything?” Shiela turned around with a single tear threatening to escape from her eye. “Oh that would never happen even on my deathbed,” “Ram what’s happened to you? Did anything go wrong today at work?” “Nothing is wrong at my workplace.” He replied hastily. “Then why do you always come in such a bad mood from work?” “I am always in a good mood but whenever I see your face my mood drops,” Ram said not really meaning it. “Is that so?” Sheila broke down. Ram and Shiela had two children –Ayesha who was 14 years old and Danish who was 11 years old. They stood watching this scene from the corner of the living room of their house. Danish was panic stricken and Ayesha was crying silently. “Don’t cry you dumb woman?” Ram sneered. He could not take his wife crying and just did not have the patience or energy to console her. He was tired from work and frustrated as his boss had once again shouted at him in front of the entire team. “Mind your language,” Shiela retorted back at Ram’s comment. “Oh I see. I will not do so, what will you do?” Ram asked onto Shiela’s face. “I will not take this behaviour of yours Ram,” “From my point of view, it is me who is dealing with your tantrums,” Ram said taking Shiela’s elbow in his hand and squeezing it. “You are hurting me Ram,” Shiela cried out. Ram realises his mistake and lets go of Shiela’s elbow. He turns around and spots his children in the corner and calls out to them but they refuse to come to him. “Come here right now Danish,” Ram bellowed on the top of his voice. “No,” Danish replied and stood his ground. “Ayesha,” Ram called out to his girl now. Ayesha too remained at her place. “So you are turning my kids against me, isn’t it Shiela?” Ram sneered once again at his wife. “Oh is that so? No, in my knowledge if one has a father who has a bad attitude, shouts frequently at home and every now and then uses his hands on his family members should be enough reason to put any child off from even getting close to such a person,” The analysis was spot on and only fueled Ram’s anger who reacted by slapping his wife with the back of his hand. Shiela fell down onto her knees and broke into sobs, “I have wasted my life on an asshole,” Ram raised his hand again to strike her when his children came and put their hands around their mother and pushed him with all their might. Ram did not stop even then and he slapped his children while Shiela tried fruitlessly in stopping him. This was the story narrated to me by Amrita when I asked her on any case she had to deal with which involved children. “Sounds like the problem of every other household,” “Not exactly. Things have certainly improved.” “So how did you come across these children?” “Their mother Shiela brought them to me.” “And what did she say?” “The boy Danish had the problem of wetting the bed and Ayesha had a power of -3 which was worrying their mother,”. I could see fears, phobias, controlling the emotions, and lot of defense mechanisms in children’s handwriting. When you are scared either you close your eyes (I can’t see) or you may tremble without control. “Wetting the bed at the age of 11?” “Yes it came from the fear of his father.” “I understand that and Ayesha’s power?” “Due to the environment at home she developed such a power. You see children are unable to take or see such things which happen at home and hence they feel stressed and worried which impacts their visual nerves and they end up getting spectacles with sometimes daunting powers,” Amrita said as she sat down. “I have seen even worst cases than this. A 14 year old boy tried to rape his own 10 year old sister. He has lot of strengths which is evident in handwriting. Strengths are not channelized properly due to lack of guidance. Like this case he also had seen abusive marriage and bitter divorce of his parents in early childhood. Now mother is a single parent and she doesnt have time to teach morals, ethics as she has to work hard to fend for them. Now the boy is way away from reality and doesnt connect to nature and society”. Amrita sighed. “In such cases, what can you tell the children?” Nothing. You don’t deal with the children in such cases as they are not the culprits. You have to work on their parents. I never feel the need to counsel the children. It is always the elders who need counselling.” “And do the parents listen?” “Not all of them but just because a few of them are hard-headed and don’t listen I cannot burden the child telling them that they are wrong or they need to change,” Amrita said with a lot of heat. “Whoa. Relax I am not disagreeing with you,” “Sorry when it comes to children I get a little sensitive. See if the parents change then, all these issues which children have died with the positive change they see in their parents.” “Did the parents take counselling on this case?” “The husband did not agree for counselling until his wife threatened to walk out on him,” “And?” “And things are settled now. He has understood his mistakes and the children now feel safe around him,” “What happened to the children’s problems?” “The boy no longer wets his bed and the girl’s power has diminished considerably,” “All’s well that ends well.” I concluded. “Environment plays a huge role in a child’s upbringing. A safe, happy and settled environment plays a huge factor in molding a child’s personality and the way he perceives life.” Expert: Noothan Rao (Internationally certified handwriting analyst & counsellor) Writer: Vicky R.
Posted on: Wed, 15 Oct 2014 09:12:55 +0000
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