Epilogue day 5 (Day 56) Thursday October 30th well into the epilogue I slept over eight hours very grateful for that I woke up a brief moment in the night and saw Jupiter rising which made me feel good but determined to SLEEP I pulled my foot under the covers and wrapped my body around the pillow defiantly and slept. . . . set up the time lapse on my 4s to capture mostly clouds as the clouds have been gorgeous the last few mornings the sky is too big to capture I sat and watched it until the sun came over the mountains I had a little sorrow that I couldnt stare at the sun without hurting my eyes that I couldnt be one with the sea without being destroyed this whole being human thing is so confusing to me I yearn to be limitless . . . I woke from a dream where I had just arrived from here somewhere else like 1930s Scotland or The Alps I dont know where it was but it was a beautiful hotel big, crazy old elevator i was late arriving after my travel Tony and Mother were there already they were finishing dinner in the dining hall as I arrived but I had to go drop my bags off in the room first before I ate the rest of the dream memory was going up and down through the elevators hallways tiny rooms flirting with bears being hungry being sore being worried about my feet dreading the walk we were going to do two weeks over the mountains then into the jungle -maybe we were in Peru I wish we hadnt planned it like this so close to finishing The Camino my feet will probably start bleeding again I didnt sleep enough they left without me . . . . . . that kinda dream but I rolled over and saw dawn was just beginning setting up the camera was frustrating I couldnt get it to stay at the angle I wanted I kept dropping everything had to use the toilet tight away then set my 5s to try and upload the video from the 28th. . . which I couldnt seem to get to upload. . . so no distractions I just watched the sky beautiful beautiful colors the lights streaking through the clouds highlighting the infinite edges so gorgeous everything so gorgeous until the sun rose and my eyes burned a little stop it. I did all my mantras no swaying little heart it seemed exhausting I tried to be with it just just listen feel it stay present it felt so difficult but I resisted drifting off I to distraction I finished the mantras I was well into feeling stir-crazy now lassitude totally paranoid I have tetanus constantly convincing myself I have it I dont have it I couldnt have it I must have it I should have just gone to a doctor I kept doing bicycles (?) in the air laying on my back moving my legs and arms trying to get everything moving nothing looks infected on my foot just crusty I spent some time writing time trying to upload videos selecting backgrounds songs for my time lapse videos compiling them failing to upload them I played some cribbage with mom she won the first game I won the next two but she is certainly getting much better hands now than she did here in Spain I ate an apple two bananas I ate some chocolate I did some yoga I made some lunch crushed potato chips serving as salt and crunch on the tomatoes with avocado, cheese, chorizo, bread. . . a few snowflakes of penicillin mold. . . thank you, M I got up and decided to make the bed the dirty tangle sheets now ordered again I felt completely over my pilgrimage and wonder if I will see any of them again by now they have all returned to their lives all of the people I met except maybe that italian guy who was walking barefoot. . . he might have caught up with me by now he was going slowly. . . I stared out the window a while I set up the 4s to make a time lapse of the bay during the day: its only fair its beautiful its a clear blue sky the forecast is for rain Evermore starting tomorrow I looked at my foot I decided to go out to walk down to the beach and put my foot in the sea maybe go swimming (the bay beach) I thought maybe I shouldnt I flipped a coin: I shouldnt I flipped a different one: I should another one? I should so I did I walked out barefoot my right foot hurt a lot to walk on I picked it up and squeezed it -crack- felt like my fourth tarsal was out of place felt a little better to walk on now but still. . . it felt so strange to be outside I was in my dirty shirt and underwear there were hardly any people I didnt talk to anyone only one barking dog I didnt know where I was and found myself down at a small beach ok. . . but no sun here so I climbed out over the barnacle covered rocks (I know. . . ) and sat on one in the sun dangling my foot in the water the layers of crust washed off nice just raw skin now ok the sun was gone I walked back up to the Hospedaje went upstairs into the shower and washed my legs and feet with the antiseptic soap went back to the room sprayed the wounds with peroxide sat there staring at the phone letting it dry getting a bit carried away I mixed salve with hypericum oil and my essential oils blend I rubbed it into all of the wounds I lay there on the bed I did my reiki combined with my inner-smile qi-gung I got up and looked outside I decided to go watch the sun set the clear sky I wrapped my wounded foot in gauss put my socks on put my shoes on and that stupid blue shirt Ive never yet washed with my wallet and phone in the pockets put my glasses out and headed out into the golden evening it hurt to walk but didnt feel like it was rubbing my wounds in a bad way I found my way to the ridge then over to the sea. . . the sun was sitting in the clear sky on the edge of an invisible mountain creating a liquid fire line ebbing out from the orb maybe thats the cloud bank that is coming to cover Galicia I watched it set behind the clouds a million miles away no not a perfect sunset but there is the sea. . . I shouldnt walk any more. . . but I have to I walked down a narrow path through a field I knew this path would lead to the path that I took to the boardwalk the last time I went to this beach the ocean beach Mar de Fora it did the path led me right to the boardwalk I walked down passed a smiling hippie lady hello on the beach a young French hippie started talking with me as if I must have been here a million times you know Im the summer its so much better when its filled with people well yes ok Im going to go be with the ocean now I walked to a rise of sand the waves reaching up just below I smiled held my arms out watched the waves come in crash froth watched the light fade I wanted to touch it but didnt dare take off my shoes a wave pushed froth up an inch from me I reached down and put my finger in it before it disappeared into the sand ok goodbye I walked back up to the boardwalk and heard someone call my name. . . really? I turned around and started walking back it was Michaela, the italian guy who walked the camino barefoot yes, I guess he did catch up with me here he was with a beautiful girl Margarite we talked I showed him some pictures it was exciting he thought hed stay here a month I mentioned some of the exciting things I knew of here and warned him about the albergue of peace we hugged he said have a nice life! and i bid him the same thats nice I walked back along the path from before to a road I knew and did feel a little short of breath tired. . . deeply exhausted. . . I called the guy from that albergue to see if I could get my €20 back no, he said I went to the bar if the guy who owned it he wasnt there I took pictures of the bus schedule I can go to santiago tomorrow I will go up to see the Ara Solis in the morning if its not raining too much and see if I can stay at that hotel thats only €20 for two nights I got some more € out of an ATM I started hunting for faster wifi to try and upload my 4 minute time lapse video no lunch but I sat and drank orange juice and bought some post cards and gave up and walked back to the Hospedaje where I found the 4s had crashed so I hadnt captured the sunset on the mountain oh well. . . I tested the three wifi networks at this place and I found the ground floor was much faster than the other two (relays. . . ) so Im sitting by the front door the 5s is uploading. . . well see Im writing. . . I tried to make a call from this phone it crashed but while standing up I noticed the name on the power box said Emilio Estavez Lopez but upon research it is most likely of no relation
Posted on: Sat, 01 Nov 2014 18:00:54 +0000
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