Evening August 7th, 2014 Little Meredith has had a bumpy, baby day. I believe she is very close to cutting two teeth on her lower gums. The aggravation built and built. After her 2 p.m. feeding she did not feel good at all and we had a very difficult hour before she finally calmed down enough to rest. It has been more time than I want to say since I held a baby that was so upset. I felt for her and though I wanted so for her to feel better, I just had to hold her and tell her I loved her. I sang to her, I tried a cool teething ring, I tried to massage her gums, but that just made her more frantic. So there we were until about 3:15 when she fell asleep. Meredith slept deeply and quietly. Her breath finally slowed and I have to say my breathing found a bit better rhythm. I looked at our granddaughter so peaceful after so much angst and remembered that I have been living in the moment, living the day. The time holding her was a memory in the making. Life is difficult for everyone at times and I forget that from Meredith’s perspective the discomfort she is experiencing is very alarming. Pain has not been a big part of her life and now she is feeling something that is new and strange. Meredith your journey is new as well and I am blessed to be with you when you are having difficulty. It is already coming up on eight o’clock and we have finished dinner. Ed is headed home with his daughter. Now I have time to write and I feel myself relaxing a bit, feeling the day a bit. I think I handled this day well. If Meredith had this kind of day a month ago I would not have done well at all. With time I am finding a way to compensate for and to resist the emotions that are still at times very much on the surface. My thinking is more disciplined because it has to be disciplined. Emotion is a wonderful part of all of us. Some like I are more prone to feel those emotions at times when the passion in my heart should not decide what the reason in my mind is supposed to do. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. James 3:17 Wisdom comes from listening and respecting those that have come before us. Those that come before us know the way to walk the journey. They can show us how to decide which way to go. Decisions must be made with the mind and tempered with the heart. From the mind comes reason and from the heart comes mercy. All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3: 16-17 When I speak of knowledge I mean spiritual knowledge. Paul wrote this letter for Timothy to instruct him and to lead him in his mission work. Timothy was young and he might receive the respect given an older man like Paul. So he laid out how to address the elders in Ephesus. I don’t remember which verse it is that Paul tells Timothy to not let anyone look down on him because he is young. He tells Timothy to be an example by how he addresses the people in Ephesus. Timothy is to model how love and faith and purity of mind and heart is to be lived. When I say listening to those that come before us and respect what they say and show us I do not mean necessarily an older person. Our last pastor was younger than me. Many Christians that I really respect and listen to are younger than myself. Spiritual wisdom comes from scripture and from those we know that are knowledgeable and live the way I try to live. When I look at Meredith and even Ed, I take very seriously my responsibility to be an example of what God expects. When I fail and I do at times, I take it to God and confess my actions. God already knows, but I have to tell you, I feel the spirit very well sometimes when I go to a quiet place and listen to God. Meredith’s day was troublesome, it challenged her. I was good today, I leaned on the spirit and held her to my chest to calm her. Calm didn’t happen right away. God’s timing is always His understanding of need and not mine. Sleep well little one, sleep well little girl. God loves you and loves me too. God is wonderful. Papi
Posted on: Fri, 08 Aug 2014 01:02:33 +0000
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