Excerpt ch.9: COMPARING GRANDMA WITH HOWARD MARSHALL It was funny, but in a way Howard Marshall reminded me of Grandma. They could both be very intimidating with hard, piercing eyes, and expressions that were very unrelenting and stern. Such intimidating demeanor conveyed an unwillingness to show the slightest hint of approval, and portrayed a distinct air of superiority. I had experienced this behavior first hand with each of them. Then they could both simply transform into completely different individuals. Displaying impeccable social skills, they would be quite charming, and especially pleasant and entertaining, but this was reserved only for certain people. This was exactly the way that Howard was around Mother. He lit up like a Christmas tree and with a twinkle in his eye, told her interesting stories about his past involvements, and endeavors which panned history on both international and national levels, and included politics, the oil business and many historical personalities. He shared inside information with her regarding things that were done both openly and in private; and their discussion would move from board rooms to bedrooms. It helped me to imagine a time when Mother could have brought out the best in my Grandma instead of the worst. I would watch in amazement as this old man who was so stingy with his approval towards me for whatever reason could then so whole-heartedly and enthusiastically approve of whatever Mother did or said. It was quite fascinating to watch. She made relating to him seem effortless and easy, and besides that, they were having a great time. Yes, she had him wrapped around her little finger, and he was absolutely delighted with that. Did he always agree with her? No, but when he didnt, he would remain cheerful and reply with sincere admiration, My lady, you may sometimes be wrong, but you are never in doubt. Mother quite simply could do no wrong as far as Howard was concerned. He was so proud of her, and always seemed relaxed and content to be in her company. Most of the time I just sat quietly and watched as she dazzled him with her wit and charm. He rarely took his eyes off of her, and would often comment on her excellent carriage as she entered the room. Constantly in a good mood around her, he would also be pleasant to everyone else, including me. It was interesting to see Mother bring out the best in Howard. As the years went by, I found myself in his company more and more to the point I eventually saw him every day of the week. I know without a doubt that Howard (just like Grandma) grew to be fond of me too. I dont believe Howard held anything back when it came to Mother. It reminded me of the Bible story of Sampson and Delilah, where Samson was so delighted with her that any sense of caution that he might have felt was simply thrown to the wind. Howard was having a wonderful time with Mother and could care less what anyone thought about it. Once he confided to Mother that a particular person had insinuated that her care and concern for him was all an act. He proudly shared his comeback as being, If it is all an act, then she is the best actress I ever saw. Mother and acting, it was hard to separate the two. The way it worked was if she was out she was on. Regardless of what he really thought it was, Howard adored her; and he loved the way he felt when he was with her. Amazingly Howard never seemed guarded or suspicious of Mothers intentions or motivation, but rather seemed extremely open and above board concerning all his affairs. To the chagrin of some, no part of his life either business or personal was in any way, shape, or form off limits to her. She knew what checks came in and when the dividends were paid, AND she was first in line. Howard had an extremely carte blanche dictum in regards to Mother. This was not his usual M.O. He explained it this way to her, Lady, if I ran my business, the way I let you run me, I wouldnt have a business. People closest to Howard began to recognize the power she had over him. This put her at odds with some who felt she was encroaching. There was big money involved and trouble was beginning to brew. Mother and Howards relationship was deeply intimate, not in the physical sense of the word, but in a very real sense of caring and respect. He derived immense pleasure out of sharing the minutes details of his day with her. Of course Lady was interested in every facet of his life. She loved him, and wanted the very best for him. This was quite obviously the way Howard felt about his lady so he poured himself out to her in complete love and abandon. Quite secure and not the least bit threatened by her strong personality, he would say affectionately on occasion Lady when I fell in love with you, I did not fall in love with a shrinking violet. The truth was Howard loved real strong women. One story in particular exemplified this to a T. Howards current wife, Betty, had been suffering from Alzheimers for years, but before she got sick, Howard had taken her on a trip to Mexico. While they were there a man had tried to sell them a wooden puppet with strings. In reply, Betty snapped, I dont need to buy a puppet, and pointed at Howard, I already have one. His look was downright gleeful as he told Mother about this as if the thought of being dominated in some way truly delighted him. His nickname for Betty was Tiger, and his first wife, Eleanor, who had borne his two sons, was Wolfie. Both names sounded ferocious to me. On the other hand, I heard different kinds of stories of his tough business dealings, and how heads would roll when the end results of an undertaking did not live up to his expectations.
Posted on: Wed, 16 Jul 2014 20:05:26 +0000
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