Explaining the Touch Avoidance/Seeking Paradox! For parents with children who experience tactile defensiveness, their children display strong avoidance reactions to touch. They may pull back defensively when others touch them, struggle during personal care, refuse to wear certain clothing, avoid touching certain textures, and feel the need to control all interaction occurring to them. However, paradoxically these same children can show strong seeking of deep pressure touch, often graving it. They can be very clingy, grabbing and holding onto mom and dad at all times. These two conditions seem contradictory if the child is sensitive to touch. If you look closely at many of the children who are tactile defensive, it is light touch that they are usually sensitive to. It is the nerve endings at the surface of the skin that are very sensitive, and set off a quick fight or flight response. However, the nerve receptors deeper into the muscles are usually not over-sensitive, so deep pressure touch cancels out the negative effect of the touch to the surface of the skin. Deep pressure touch goes past the surface, activating the receptors in the muscles and tendons. Deep pressure touch also has a calming effect on the nervous system and can help calm and organize the often anxious nervous system of those who are tactile defensive. So, when touching children with tactile defensiveness, use firm touch, to avoid activating the fight or flight response. Now, for the children who are grabby and clingy, these children may also want to seek out constant touch. They grab and hold on tight to you, and pull on you. They may be touching everything in sight to explore and get tactile feedback. Again, if you look closely there are two qualities: (1) the child is controlling the touch; they are touching you, rather then you touching them, and (2) it is usually firm touch, not light touch. Even with light touch, they can often handle it if they are controlling the touch. These same children may seek out soothing tactile stimulation by smearing feces or saliva on their skin. This controlled stimulation can be soothing to the anxious nervous system. Touch is a basic human need, and often the sensory sensitive child will grave touch, but have to (1) control it, and (2) seek if firmly. They can be tactile avoiders on the one hand, and be tactile seekers at the same time. This often seems paradoxical. However, when interacting with kids with tactile defensive, my recommendations are: 1. Warn them before touching them. 2. If possible, let them control the touch (let them hold your hand, instead of you holding theirs). 3. When touching, use firm pressure touch, instead of light touch. 4. Invite touch, do not force it on them. I use “give ten” to celebrate a lot. However, I always reach out my hands, and allow the child to touch me, rather than touching them. Keep it safe, but let the child control it. 5. Understand what parts of the body are more sensitive than others. Often the hands, feet, and face are very sensitive, whereas the back shoulders, arms and legs are usually less sensitive. Give physical affection, firmly to those areas. 6. Most importantly, be respectful of their sensitivity. Immediately withdraw your touch if the child reacts negatively, reassure him, and then proceed with caution only with their permission. Work with the child, respect his sensitivity, and allow him to control as much as possible. 7. I also teach people who are tactile defensive that briskly rubbing the surface of the skin, will temporarily dull the sensitivity. So, if they know that someone (e.g. doctor) is going to touch them, they can rub that spot vigorously just prior to them touching there. This will temporarily dull the sensitivity. This series on “sensory issues” can be found in the blue book, “Autism Discussion Page on the Core Challenges of Autism”.
Posted on: Wed, 21 Jan 2015 10:57:26 +0000
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