FAME! The long winded RANT: I never understood or agreed with the current artist persona- that playing hard to get with the audience and media, that unaffected attitude which brushes off attention while secretly begging for it,that false sense of cool that denys itself that one big reality- you need fans!, that basic disinterest in the response you were hoping for. But for some reason it works! Its like fans subconsciously want to be ignored, they want to believe they are less hanging out with more, so that when more responds they can feel less like less and more like more- when they do, well its on to the the next more they feel less than. Think about that for a second, at its worst its almost like a drug addiction and at its best its a basic game of playing hard to get. Do we ever escape grade school? I mean, isnt this the same science behind that teenage caste system? Its like there is some form of value being instituted by one through denying some other form of value in another. Where does it begin? How does value get established in the first place? Isnt playing hard-to-get just the machine that keeps that initial value going? Well, thats a whole problem in itself- because for musicians its rarely the actual music. Its mostly some co-sign, if not by another famous person its by some friend who holds some social-value within some scene one looks to for self-confidence. I am absolutely NOT saying this is the case for EVERYONE, not at all! I def dont believe this is how EVERYONE gets or appreciates music- BUT, I DEF believe this is a LARGE part of it all. In fact, I would venture to say (since I love %) that less than 30% of music listeners are actually music lovers- (and I think Im being generous). I think 70% listen for social reasons- for social capitol, to BE social. Not mad at that. What can I be mad at then? Well, I noticed something in my early 20s as a local act opening for major acts passing through Colorado- and it sparked an idea which has proven itself over and over again (in my profession) ever since. Some peoples sense of value of themselves is easily manipulated by a perfect stranger. Basically what am I saying... I guess, you learn the sheep like quality in humanity by being an artist, and its really sad. Its something, that once you focus on it (and not just for your own good) you have then try and block it out, because 1) Its super depressing and 2) youll feel too guilty about your every move you make as an influencer. My first experience with this reality came when I noticed the stark contrast between doing a show at a local bar and doing the same show/music at a major venue as an opener for a major act. Back then, I had no name and gave both venues the same performance, however, the response from fans differed GREATLY between venues. So different that it was offensive. Now, Im a hyper alert person, always staring at society, individuals, building a narrative in my head with strangers. Im a story teller ( I hope), so I view a lot, and I view it deeply- so these contrasting reactions stuck with me and I added them to every instance since. We are talking over 800+ shows + every other interaction Ive had in this industry which simulates the same type of responses. From a kid begging you to sign their clothing after opening for Common (99) from having to explain to them later, while taking their Pizza order, that I was that person on stage... and getting that laugh like he was embarrassed to be a fan. From going from a no-one to a someone in the time it takes to explain who Ive toured with, or the label I was on, etc- regardless of my music. And you wonder why so many artists name drop? And you wonder why so many artists brag about their business? Their travel? Their label? Their experiences? Ive yet to do that in my music- But I might have to start. Underestimated because they havent heard your music? I understand. Underestimated because of your number of likes, followers, and youtube views? Disgusting. Youd be surprised at how many blogs I tried to strong arm to play my music, until I found out it only took a name drop or two. ON Rawkus, Quannum, and even having Sony/Red distribution- Ive always been the same dude, with the same raps as OFF them! Constance has almost 800k views? Cool. My collab with Hocus Pocus Hip Hop almost 4million? Cool. BUT Insomnia struggling with 30k? Pale Blue Dot struggling with 30k? Am I a failure because of this? No. My music has always been of the same value to me. Do you know how many people would see those 800k views and compare them to my 30K views and see that as a failure in my musical talents? 70% of the music listening population IMO. Its just too damn easy to acquire (perceived) talent through aesthetics. And to keep it... you just have to deny fans and media their right to see you as a regular ass person. Thats what I am though. Think about it, not much of a statement when I only have 8k likes huh? Maybe if I had 2million likes, my statement- Im just a regular ass person might mean more? No. Fact is fact. Some fans seriously lose interest when you refuse them their right to see you as famous. When you show your real life, your real finances, real pictures, clothing, status, state of being... real thoughts, and complications...when they see you sweat, bleed, be fearful, be desperate, hell...some fans even hate for you to truly, truly, appreciate them. It just all looks too normal... Artists treat each other the same way. Artists dont want to collaborate for musical reasons, they want to collaborate for promotional reasons. In 98-99 I saw the contrast between fan adoration depending on the venue and promotional circumstances and NOT on my music. In 07 I saw the contrast between artist and industry respect depending on the label youre on, the hype you have with the public, and NOT on my music. I lost a lot of contacts when Rawkus went under, I saw the friendliest of faces change quick. Its a sad thing to see.. the transformative nature of self-interest, nothing shared, nothing truly gained- no community in this industry, self for self- and music... well whats that? We could have just as well been talking about hacky-sacks. Heehaw I saw this all to clear my mind at your eyes expense haha and if youve gotten this far to say, THANK YOU! once again... you 30%, youve made my career possible against all the odds- because of MUSIC! I also say this, to shout into the atmosphere to no one really listening... if I ever make it to label status again, I will def ignore 70% of you. Fame is a joke and the only people laughing are the people who dont care about music- at all. Love yall (as much as a stranger can love another ha), 9 days left to get this last record of mine... dont say I didnt warn you.
Posted on: Tue, 19 Aug 2014 22:40:28 +0000